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Mother not fully accepting..."choosing"

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Stranger87, Mar 14, 2014.

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  1. Stranger87

    Stranger87
    Regular Member

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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Hi, I'm new here, and would much appreciate any advice you may have...

    I'm in my late 20s and have had two long-term, serious relationships in my life, my first was with a man at age 22, and the other with a woman at age 26, with each relationship lasting almost a year. I haven't really dated.

    I consider myself bisexual, but I think I prefer women...I don't particularly like being penetrated during sex, not because it hurts, but because I find something "unequal" and "psychologically invasive" about it...I prefer to take a "male" role during sex, more dominant. I have never been sexually abused, so I am not sure why I feel this way. I am afraid that I could not be with a man long term, because sex with a man usually involves penetration...

    I don't know how to explain this to my mother as it is very intimate and embarrassing. She has asked me things like when I will "start dating men again." I'm not entirely opposed to meeting a man, but he would have to be understanding of my sexual preferences and still let me sleep with women...I wouldn't want to give that up.

    How can I explain this to my mother?
     
    #1 Stranger87, Mar 14, 2014
  2. Claudette

    Claudette Guest

    My mother took awhile for her to truly come around, The best thing I could do was to explain everything I was going through, what I was thinking etc to her, this helped her alot.
    There are some pdf booklets on Pflags website, They should help you and her be prepared for any questions
     
    #2 Claudette, Mar 14, 2014
  3. King

    King
    Full Member

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    Be firm with your mother and explain that you will have a relationship with whoever you like, no matter what their gender may be.

    As for your sexual issue, maybe if you meet the right guy and really love him then it might change the situation as you would feel comfortable with him.

    If that is not the case then there are plenty of other sexual acts that can be performed on a man, the internet has many creative ways and if he feels for you then maybe he will do non-penetrative acts with you. You may need to meet him in the middle though and do occasional penetrative sex.

    You could talk this other with a therapist, I am not suggesting that you have any kind of illness or issues, but discussing things to another person can help clarify your thoughts and get to the route of the problem.

    Best of luck.
     
    #3 King, Mar 14, 2014
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