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are these signs that she could be interested? advice and opinion needed, please?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by ogzltheeve, Mar 18, 2014.

  1. ogzltheeve

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    there's this girl who i've been friends with for a year from school. we've had many classes together but this semester we don't have any classes. however, i still see her every week at least twice or three times. she often texts me that she misses me. like saturday while she was at work she texted me "Miss you <3" but I LITERALLY saw her the day before and the one before that too...so how can I be missed already? it just seems overly friendly. it's kind of confusing me because she's the only one that does this to me. not even my really close friends tell me they miss me as much as she does.

    and on valentines day she texted me "Happy valentines day" with a bunch of emoticons which she sent out to other friends too but when i replied back she ended up screenshotting my text message and uploading it on her instagram with a caption that read "<3 she made my day #loveofmylife" and this is before she uploaded anything about her and her boyfriend on v-day.

    recently in school she surprised me by buying a shirt from my "coming-out campaign" that i'm working on. she's the FIRST person to support my campaign by buying the shirt. so in school she surprised me by wearing it. i gave her the biggest hug and she seemed to really enjoy it. i told her i wanted to take a picture of her wearing it and she said "next time. i'll wear it again and look cute." then gave me a quick little hug. we walked each other after class and told me to drive her home because she wanted to talk to me more. then later she texted me to go out to happy hour but i told her i couldn't so she texted back "awe okay <3 we need to hang out soon please"

    on st. pattys day while we were at the bar with another friend i saw her staring at me through the corner of my eye. when i turned to look in her direction we briefly made eye contact. i quickly smiled at her and she smiled back and looked away. when walked outside we all put each other's hands in each other's coat pockets since it was cold and she commented "it's okay we're all lesbians." although she was probably joking.

    p.s: i'm bi-sexual and she knows that already. but she doesn't know i like her. and i'm not even sure if she even feels anything for me. since she's been in a relationship with her boyfriend for a year. so she obviously loves him. however i'm not sure if she's a closet bi-curious. and i'm starting to fall hopeless in love with her.
     
  2. rainmustfall

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    I would just ask directly. I know it sounds intimidating and hard to do, but some people are just flirty and unless you know there intentions from the start, really bad things can happen. Don't play games with her more serious than casual flirting unless you know for certain.
     
  3. ogzltheeve

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    asking her would put me in a spot where she'd probably know i like her if i were to question her about it. :/ but believe me i do want to ask her. like really bad. i'm just scared. for many reasons
     
  4. silverhalo

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    It's sounds like it's possible that she likes you but as others have said you can't be sure. You have to be careful because she has a boyfriend and you don't want to cause upset there. Do you think you could ask her? How do you think she would react?
     
  5. rainmustfall

    rainmustfall Guest

    I am pretty certain from what she is doing she knows you like her. Asking is not offensive as long as you are polite about it. Just ask yourself this, does the fear of asking her outweigh the pain of getting to serious with the flirting and getting your heart broken? If you you look at it like that, it's a lot less scary.
     
  6. ogzltheeve

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    I have no idea...to be honest. I doubt she'll hate me for asking her but she'll definitely know that I like her. and i honestly don't feel like being in a vulnerable place. but at the same time i want to tell her that i like her. i just don't know what i would say or how to say it

    ---------- Post added 18th Mar 2014 at 12:45 PM ----------

    you really think she knows? i'm not sure... i mean i don't flirt with her at all. and if she knew that i liked her already then her doing all those things would mean she's influencing it...i'm at a total lost and it's driving me up on walls. I feel like i'm the only person to confront her about it because she's probably not. especially since she's already in a relationship. i might just try distance myself from her. because it's really starting to depress me :/
     
  7. Landslide

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    I'd say distance might be a good idea and if she starts questioning why you haven't been around her or talking to her, then maybe take that opportunity to bring up the flirting.

    But if you confront her directly, of course in a nice way, then it could resolve the issue. If it was me, i'd make a light joke about it and see how she reacts
     
  8. ogzltheeve

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    yeah...i'll have to distance myself from her although it'll be slightly difficult. but it's doable. but do you think she was flirting?
     
  9. Landslide

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    I think she might have been flirting. With the miss you texts and the valentines day instagram thing, it seems like it. But you have to be careful because she could just be one of those girls who does it for attention. Or she could just be overly affectionate. Girls are unpredictable usually.

    How well do you know her? Have you talked about important things and hung out alot, gotten close? Because figuring this out kind of depends on that.
     
  10. ZombieEater

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    Try being more touchy feely with her. Next time she hugs you, don't let go immediately, hold on for a bit and see how she reacts. If she relaxes into the hug you have your answer.
     
  11. sldanlm

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    She might be joking, but it might also be a probing remark. When I was in HS, the two girls I had relationships made all kinds of "jokes" at first, we were feeling each other out, so to speak.

    She may love him emotionally, I thought I loved a guy in my senior year emotionally for a long while, but that didn't mean I was straight. I even wanted it to be so, but it wasn't. Even if she does have feelings for you, it doesn't mean she's a lesbian or bisexual either. I had a girl who loved me emotionally, and thought she was a lesbian, but found out anything beyond hugging wasn't right for her, just the same way I felt about my HS boyfriend. The only way that you're going to know for sure is to talk to her about it.
     
  12. ogzltheeve

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    When i look back on that I feel like she might've been doing it for attention... I'm not sure... we've started hanging out more than we did last year. but we're not close friends.

    ---------- Post added 18th Mar 2014 at 06:39 PM ----------

    Thanks i really appreciate your comments. I found them to be very helpful. And yeah I know the only way i'll ever find out is if i talk to her about it. I've been wanting to so bad. I just don't know when the right time is. or even how to bring it up. :/