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Taking a break from my boyfriend

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by musicalshyguy, Mar 19, 2014.

  1. musicalshyguy

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    Hi. Me and this amazing guy (his name is Greg) started going out on the 12th this month, and we're kind of doing great. I have selective mutism (which means I'm only comfortable with verbally talking to certain people.) Me and Greg skype every day, although he's the only one that talks. He accepts my shyness but it has gotten to the point that he gets upset because I'm scared to talk to him on the phone. He begs me and I feel like shit because I won't talk to him. I'm scared he's going to break up with me because I'm a worthless boyfriend. We got in a little argument just now and I told him I'm going to take a small break from him. I'm not mad at him. I love him but I just need some time alone. Am I stupid for doing this? Why am I so dumb? :bang:
     
  2. pianoguy88

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    If you were worthless, he WOULDN'T be talking to you. Don't you ever forget that.

    Does he know specifically about your condition?
     
  3. musicalshyguy

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    Yeah. I explained to him.
     
  4. pianoguy88

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    Even better. As long as he understands what you told him, he thinks that you're WORTH the effort nonetheless.

    If you really want things to work out with this guy, then make things right. Make sure he knows that you want him in your life.
     
  5. robclem21

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    I agree with this, BUT, it can still be very frustrating from his standpoint and I think you seem to also be understanding of where he is coming from. As much as you may be worth the effort, not being able to talk to your boyfriend is a very big barrier.

    I think if you need to take a break less than 10 days of dating, that probably signals a bigger problem. You might need to accept that fact that it isn't going to work. I think this is a situation where just understanding the problem is probably not going to be enough. Maintaining this type of relationship isn't right for everybody, regardless of how he might feel about you and vice versa.
     
  6. Vskokrew

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    Umm it feels a little too one sided here. What if he's doing the same thing to you, won't you be a little cautious? Maybe you should try to learn and adapt to your shy-ness and be available for him =] good luck
     
  7. Sasha Braus

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    I don't think it's a matter of adapting. The OP isn't actually doing anything on purpose, his condition is acting as a barrier. His boyfriend doing the same thing isn't even remotely comparable, and would actually be considered cruel in my opinion.

    I agree with robclem21; if you're taking a break after only dating for a little more than a week, I would reevaluate the relationship or at least properly talk it out face to face.
     
  8. musicalshyguy

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    We're back to normal now. I love him so much :kiss:
     
  9. pianoguy88

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    Glad to hear that you decided to stick with it, and that things are working out a bit better now. Congrats! (*hug*)
     
  10. emkorora

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    I concur.