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Is he gay, straight, asexual, or doesn't know

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by XTREMEZish, Apr 2, 2014.

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  1. XTREMEZish

    XTREMEZish
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    So I have this one friend of mine who we are roughly the same age. Only by a month. I wanted to know this, he doesn't really seam to be anything. The topic of liking a girl makes him uncomfortable and he tries to change the subject, and the thought of him liking a guy makes him uncomfortable. His mannerism reminds me a lot of myself when I was denying to myself that I was gay. He always talks about sex but when ever my friends and I (all of them are straight...I think) bring up a gender male or female he gets very quite. He is only 13 as well, but I knew since I was ten that I liked guys not girls. Does he not know yet, is he in denial? I really like him and have a minor crush on him. What should I do? Should I confront about my feelings and questioning for him knowing that if he is straight it will destroy our friendship? Should I let this thing play out? What do I do?:help:
     
    #1 XTREMEZish, Apr 2, 2014
  2. TJ

    TJ
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    It's awesome that you're thinking of your friend, but I think it'd be better to leave him to his own devices.
    Not everyone figures out their sexuality at such an early age, and frankly, not everyone needs to. It might just be better for him to not have to think about it until his mind is ready, and until he starts to figure it out himself.

    Don't take this harshly, but another possibility is that you could be reading too much into his actions, seeing as you do have a minor crush on him.

    He still has plenty of time for his mind and personality to develop, so I'd let it play out and see how he ends up. There's no need to interfere with him at such an early age.

    Just my two cents. :slight_smile: Let me know if you have any thoughts.
     
    #2 TJ, Apr 2, 2014
  3. WhiteShadows

    WhiteShadows
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    He's still pretty young. He might be questioning or just uncomfortable with the topic.
     
    #3 WhiteShadows, Apr 3, 2014
  4. XTREMEZish

    XTREMEZish
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    well the weirder thing is he asked me to sleep next to him when he was at my house. I said yes and then he spent the entire time talking about girls. He was about an inch away from my lips the entire time. Then we fell asleep like that.

    BTW I am out to him
     
    #4 XTREMEZish, Apr 6, 2014
    Last edited: Apr 6, 2014
  5. SwimScotty

    SwimScotty
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    It sounds like he might be somewhat confused. Just because someone talks about sex doesn't necessarily mean that they know what's going on in their own heads. I wouldn't ask him about it unless he offers, because that could have a negative impact on your relationship. But I also agree with what TJ said that you might just be reading too deep. Sometimes if you want something your mind will interpret everything as positive for that goal, and it's quite possible that that's what's happening here.
     
    #5 SwimScotty, Apr 6, 2014
  6. WhiteShadows

    WhiteShadows
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    Well, at the very least he seems to look up to you as a trusted friend. I say just keep being someone who can support him for the time being :slight_smile:
     
    #6 WhiteShadows, Apr 6, 2014
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