It just came to me the other day that I've been following a pattern. I used dating to fulfill my emotional pain. My life changed dramatically the last year or so, I had to move from the States to the UK. And that wasn't particularly a matter of choice. Which I wasn't happy about and haven't come to terms with. I just realized with dating I've been subconsciously trying to fill an emotional hole. I got in two short relationships total that I knew were incompatible and decided to stay simply for the companionship. That wasn't a strong reason to maintain them. In the last one I believed the problem was his flaws and the fact he wouldn't change drove me away (more details on my other thread). Now I know that wasn't the case. It's true how pets really help in that way, I used to have a kitty I had to give away before I moved. I remember how much emotional stability he'd given me. I used to be more dependent on people I'd date before I got her too. I feel sad that I'm back on square one. Unfortunately I can't get a pet here. I work out a lot which keeps my mind busy but I feel a big gap inside me won't go away. I just don't know what to do to be happy again...obviously dating people is not an option anymore.
Why isn't dating an option? Just because you've had issues in the past does not mean you can't continue to work on and improve how you function in a relationship. Part of that is finding a patient guy, but every relationship can be good experience if you treat it as such. You're already doing what I'd advise - Just keep yourself busy with things that make you happy. If you can't care for someone, care for other things - work, the community, friends, the environment, etc. That's how I fill any gaps I have. Just take a bit more time to do stuff. It'll keep your mind off of things. Of course, it can't fill the gap that comes with a relationship, but just keep working on improving yourself until you find another potential partner, then try it out again.
