totally flipped out

Buy some pepperspray or something. Or just use your falcon punch that knocked out that dick.

 

Go you Sam! and u should feel good dammit fight the power and take back your life any assholes that get in the way on your rode just run them over and move on and no your not crazy after 12 years of that stupid shit I would go mentally insane and probably kill someone but typically I like to keep things verbal and yes it may feel good but u do feel bad I know how that feeling is this one girl was bullying me (I know pathetic right) and so I stood up to her amd said "u r nothing but a dumb fat ass fucking bitch" and I felt bad about saying it but at the same time I felt great! Anyway don't live your life with regrets and keep your head up high

 

Id recommend seeing someone about your anger issues if you are not. You really should avoid physical confrontation as well.

 

After dealing with it for years and in many different ways, including violence, I found it easier to just rationalize what they said and find the logic in it, and then either accept or reject their statement. Sometimes I'd joke about it. A while later I noticed that if you give them attention they'll always come back, so I'd just ignore the entirety of their being unless they invaded my personal space or just directly offend me physically. I'd even recurr to the teachers and counselors and all that and if the transgressors'd tell me I'm a coward or whatever I'd answer: "I'm not. You don't drop your BS so I had to use other means"

Example: "faggots should die". Logical thinking: "that's homofobic and like neo-nazism. There're all kinds of homosexual people who contribute to society in one way or another, and their sexual preferences has nothing to do with their worth as human beings." So I disagree with his statement and just answer, if I do: "no, they don't" And that's it.

If someone calls me fag or homo or whatever, I'd always respond: "No, I'm just homo", but generally just ignore the offensive words because I understand that the words they spoke of do not represent my being, so it's not true. When I felt nice, I'd repond to an insult like "fucking faggot", with: "Only on thursdays" and if they kept insisting I'd be like: "I'm not interested in you, so deal with your shit and stop bothering me" or with "you must be jealous to be so insistent"

Also I generally think of how little their self-esteem must be and how hard it must be if they're actually in the closet and put that front up because of their jealousy of someone fully accepting his/her sexuality and not giving a fuck about it. Most of the kids that bothered me had a big messed up life, I know for a fact. So that was probably their way of dealing with their shit. Some others just needed to feel superior...a lot actually. And there are others who were religious, and other who just couldn't accept it. But there were also those who didn't care and those were worth it.

But I learnt how to deal with it. And each time they kept calling me that, I realized that I was truly a homo, not a fag because that has another meaning in it. And I accepted myself even more. Of course, one way or the other there was always this guy who needed a beating. But that's it.

This has probably to do with the fact that you're still not out and all that self-accepting. I stopped internalizing what other people told me I was and start truly debating what I truly was. And until I started accepting myself as I am and actually caring for who I was I kept on caring what others said.

It gets better Just keep figthing in the non-violent way

Keep us updated and best of luck

 

I always try to avoid violence, but if need be, use a swift kick in the nuts.

But on a serious note: Have you gone to anyone at school and told them how he started this, and you were defending yourself? After all, he spit on you. If need be, I'd even lie. Say he hit you first. Sometimes, you have to play dirty with people, as the world does not always favor the fair. The path to justice can be crooked.

 

Take comfort in the fact that teens and adolescents are unnecessarily cruel. They prey on the weak or what they perceive as weakness in order to feel strong themselves. Usually the bullies are the most miserable people around; some have terrible lives at home and bully others as a means of exercising some semblance of control in their lives and the lives of others. Threatening/scaring someone they see as vulnerable makes them feel powerful when most times they feel completely powerless.

I pity bullies. But seeing the damage they cause, I also resent them. My feelings toward bullies are pretty complex. But I guess I wanted to agree with those who said to avoid violence. You don't want to be the type of person who fights back by resorting to the same or similar methods as the terrible people who provoke you. The "high road" is the best road; although it's almost always the hardest to take, it's also the most satisfying in the long-run. Case in point: Hitting your bully initially made you feel better, but now you feel a lot of guilt.

Things will and do get better, especially once you're out of high school. Sometimes young people are just awful, closed-minded, naive people with no life experience and uneducated opinions, usually just regurgitating the hate they grew up listening to. Half the time you can't even fault them for their prejudices because they were taught to hate rather than to accept. Thankfully, the times they are a-changin' and the haters are becoming outnumbered.

For example: Ten years ago, maybe even as little as five years ago, if I would have walked down the street holding hands with my boyfriend, we would have been verbally tormented. Today, we do walk down the street holding hands, and almost every single time at least one person will come up to us and tell his how adorable and what a cute couple we are. In the year we've been together, we've never had a single nasty look or comment.

Like that pro-tolerance campaign says, it does get better.