A crush.

There's a boy who rides my bus. He used to hate with me with a fiery passion, but he says he doesn't hate me anymore; in fact likes me.

I normally sit with this boy and he's rather cute. He matches a lot of the things I like about people and also is very intelligent. He's half-Freshman half-Eighth grader and he's already taking calculus.

Normally, he would sit on the outside of the seat as to keep me out because he wouldn't like me sitting there, but lately he has accepted a lot of my foolery and awaits for me to sit there, instead of another boy who I know very well.

I mess with my crush a lot, I poke at his sides and push his buttons constantly. Lately, he has been playing back. He grabs my hand or sometimes just caresses it. He invited me to his house this weekend.

Here is the confusing part. Although he seems gay to me for reasons I have not described, he has a girlfriend whom he seems to like.

I went roller-skating (which I am not very good at) today with him, his girlfriend and a girl in my neighborhood. I met his girlfriend and they seem to like each other. I tended to see him looking at me a bit more than his girlfriend; she's rather attractive.

I might be over-analyzing this all, but I feel as though his girlfriend is a cover-up and his feelings are becoming mutual with mine.

I won't be going to his house this weekend, though. He seems to want to be with me in private.

I remember this past Friday, he was sitting with me on the bus and [jokingly?] made a kissy face and went near me while I was looking at him, then I made a kissy face with my lips and then he stopped and made an obviously fake surprised face.

He also likes to make me do him favors and he'll say, "If you don't do it I'll never talk to you again!" and I won't go and do it and he'll try to ignore me and look at his I-Pod whilst playing music and watching it's black screen, but I could see in the reflection he was not looking at the I-Pod but he was looking at me.

He normally plays with my hands, or sometimes I'll tickle his chin and he'll return the favor. I often grip his belly or sides and just squeeze over and over because I know it makes him upset and laugh, but now he just let's me do it. He lets me touch his belly and his sides and his legs and he doesn't react in any negative way, sometimes even touching me.

They held hands while they were skating though.

What do you think, reader?

 

I have no real way to contact him is the problem. It's not that I denied his offer, it's that it was offered but never really planned out.

I've only known him for about two months tops, though. I have asked him if he was gay, but he just jokes about it. I have asked it a lot and he has only once said no.

 

An update, I guess!

I went to his house with a friend; a three minute drive but hour walk. I've met his parent's and they seem to like me, which is good.

He's seeming more and more -gay- every day. He let's me touch him entirely now, he flirts with me, he's almost making it obvious. I'm just waiting for the day when he jumps out of the closet and love can ensue.

I've also come out of the closet at school, which is good-ish. Some people are making rumors but they are so disorganized they'll never catch on. People applaud me. My crush doesn't know I'm gay yet, but I think the moment he knows he'll either tell me he's gay or tell me he's not, once and for all.
:icon_bigg

 

I told him today. He says he's not gay. I continued to tell him that a lot of the things he does is flirting.

He says he does it with everyone.

I have a suspicious feeling that he'll come out at some point.

 

Hey. I decided to come back here to necro-post, because why not?

I wanted to update on the situation.
The girl he was with, he broke up with. After eight months, he has no quarrel over it. He hates her guts. I got over him for a while, even got very close to a relationship with someone else. However, the moment he broke up with his girlfriend, he began to drift towards me.

Throughout the past couple of months, he's let me touch him, poke at him, talk to him about personal things. He trusts me. I'm in love with him again because I know there's a chance.

He's talked to me about how he doesn't really know his sexuality, however I know he has a mad crush on a girl who I am also friends with. I've been trying to help him get with this girl, even though it hurts my chances.

I explained the Kinsey Scale to him, then decided to ask where he would place himself on the Kinsey Scale. He said, "Probably 1, Maybe 2." These words are basically the only reason I still try. He says a lot of mean things to me, but he's only kidding; absolutely certain, we've shit-talked each other jokingly since the day we met. However, he had been doing it a lot so I asked him why he's always saying mean things. He got a bit sad, then started rubbing my arm and said he was just kidding.

He's been trying really hard to have me spend the night at his house or to spend the night at mine. I'm just hoping he wants to cuddle the night away with me. That's all I want to do, is cuddle with this boy. He's so small and adorable and I just keep on hoping he'll be bisexual. One thing that's certain, he's not straight; he's also not gay. He's just in a confusing spot of life.

Once again, sorry for the necropost; advice please! :smilewave

 

When I came out, life just became different. My friends shifted from guys to girls, I still have a close clique of guy friends who just view me as different but an important part of the clique to get all the viewpoints they can.

There have been a small amount of uncultured brutes, but nobody has ever laid a hand on me. I don't really "act gay" a lot of people say; they're used to the stereotypical gays at my school, who I actually really, really dislike.

EDIT: I also wanted to add, I'm taking a girl to Winter Homecoming. I like her, she's a senior. I'm not attracted to her, but I really do like her personality. She likes cuddles, whoever likes cuddles and practices good hygiene is good enough for me. That's not shallow, is it?

 

I usually talk to him over Kik, but I like the times in person a lot more than texting. That's how I am with everyone.