I grew up in a very conservative, very Christian home. It took me until I was half way through college to figure out I am a lesbian, right around the time I stopped going to church. I was taught my entire life that 'gays' go to hell, they're disgusting, the worst thing you can be, etc. Needless to say, coming out to my parents was horrible. Lots of crying, yelling, guilt. I also told them I wasn't sure what I believed anymore (as far as church and god were concerned), when really I know there's no way I will ever be a Christian again. That was about a year and a half ago. I love my parents, and I know they're trying to do what they think is best, but it's getting harder and harder for me to have a relationship with them. They don't acknowledge that I have a girlfriend, and that we live together. They change the subject whenever I bring her up, and she's certainly not allowed to come with me when I go visit (not that I've ever even bothered to ask). They are constantly sending me facebook messages and texts about god and how they are praying for me and how much they love me, and I usually just never respond back. I've been able to brush it off and let it go, until now. My brother's college graduation ceremony was two days ago....but did they tell me about it? No. Was I even invited? No. I just saw the status updates and pictures on facebook. And that hurt. A lot. I haven't said anything to them about it yet, and I don't know if I will. I'm not sure where to go from here, as far as our relationship goes...part of me wants to say screw you and cut them out forever. But the other part of me loves them dearly and can't bear the thought of not having them in my life. I don't know what to do.:help:
You might show your parents the example of Alan and Leslie Chambers, a couple who used to lead one of the largest Christian "ex-gay" groups, Exodus International. They chose to shut it down because they realized the real harm they were doing. Speak. Love. | You should seriously reconsider why you come home to visit if you're girlfriend is not allowed. I don't think you should cut off communication, but you do need to be more direct with them and point out the problems. Tell them you love them, but that you don't want their conditional love.
Thanks resu for the ideas. I guess I'm afraid to confront them again, because I know what they'll say. I feel like nothing I can say to them will ever make them understand, so I usually just don't even bother.
