I hate the feeling of being left behind ever since my mom died 18 years ago. Then now I got really close to my little cousin and it was very hard for me to let her go. I wanted her to stay but I can't be selfish for she have to go school and she can no longer be with us. I was heartbroken. And now I am left all alone again, no one to talk to, an outcast, a loner all over again. It pains me to see myself go through this stage again and again and again. My little cousin would always tell me that I was very lucky to have all the things that gives me temporary joy. But I am happy? No. I have been wishing on my lucky stars to give me someone who will show me real happiness, give the love I deserve. So tired of asking someone's attention to listen to all my bullsh*ts. In the end, I just want to be HAPPY.
