I'm so irritated right now. In less than six days, I will have to go back to my home in rural Kentucky and leave all of my friends until August. I feel like I have a B in every class, which is depressing. I study more than most of my friends combined, and I still don't do as well as them. I ended up going full-slut in a game of spin the bottle and made out with almost every girl in my friend group. Now I have feelings for most of them because I can't seem to separate physical affections from emotional connections. I feel like my eating disorder is coming back, except I'm too fat for an eating disorder so no one will care. I think my MDNOS is hitting a low, which sucks ass because its really hard to pull myself out of this rut when I fall back into it. To be honest, I just want to be lovely. I want nice grades and a cute body and a girlfriend (I'm not too hot on having another boyfriend right now...) and a happy personality and I just feel like absolute shit right now...
i really think that if someone really loves you will love for who you are not for your body and as for your grades seeing someone is really going to make it worst since most of the time you will be thinking about him\her and you might have a fight you cant study because of it i had that before so if you really want good grades dont get close to love for now and i will say it again if anybody will love they will love you for who you are not the body you have how fat or slim you are etc...... even though im gay i once falled for this hot girl who is fat too but we broke up cause she was a lesbian too and we both dont really think it will work out but at least we tried i used to think im ugly and she used to think she is fat and ugly but i think she is so cute ^.^ edit : i hate the word fat people get fat sometimes doesnt mean they are ugly i just hate that people judge them because of that and i when i hear the word fat i remember bullies saying it to girls so i really hate it -.- i like cute instead ^^
