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Jealousy In Friends With Benefits

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by BoiGeorge, Jun 18, 2014.

  1. BoiGeorge

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    Hey, so I have this friend and we have decided to be friends with benefits. We both thought one another was incredibly hot last year but we both had girlfriends and couldn't do anything about our lust for each other last year. This year however we have. We have both discussed that what we are doing is just a casual thing and neither of us wants a relationship from this. We have made that very clear. But whenever we go out on the town with friends and she ends up making out with other people, I can't help but feel a little jealous. I don't have romantic feelings for her at all, but I guess I might just be a little defensive at the thought of her picking someone else over me to stay the night. Is this normal? I've really analysed how I feel about this and I have acknowledged that I don't have feelings for her, being friends with benefits is as far as I want to go, I don't want a relationship... Yet I still feel a little jealous when she gets with other people. What's going on here?
     
  2. Phoenix Rising

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    Like you said, it could very well be an issue of pride..a bit jealous perhaps that she is choosing someone else over you...I know if I was in your position, I probably would have the same reaction...it would be like a blow to my self esteem, like "oh, she thinks this person is more attractive than me" or whatever. I mean, friends with benefits, you can do whatever you want when I'm not around, but I feel, when you are with me, you go home with ME that night, and you pay attention to ME that night...anything else I don't need to know about...
     
  3. BoiGeorge

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    Exactly! Glad to know what I'm feeling isn't too bizarre. I guess I'm not really a fan of having a blow to my ego :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: haha
     
  4. stocking

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    I think it's like people don't like others touching what they like what they think belongs about them even if they don't care about it that much or like it that much but once someone else wants or they pay attention to someone else they become more valuable than they were before .
     
  5. BoiGeorge

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    Yeah true. "You don't know what you've got until it's gone"
     
  6. stocking

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    Yes that's it
     
  7. softbutch5765

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    It happens. It would make you feel that friend with benefit is 'yours' when she's with you. But to see her going with someone else, even when you're around will make you feel jealous because it's a blow to your ego, pride or whatever. It's like, "i'm here, yet she goes with someone else. is that person better than me?". But in reality, there will always be someone better or lesser than you - which makes comparing ourselves to other people, quite foolish.