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Is it possible to be the "only gay in the family"?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by McShuggles, Jun 20, 2014.

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  1. McShuggles

    McShuggles
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    Hey again guys! Second thread here. I'm making this one as I am simply curious.

    You've always been aware of the 'gay gene' argument I'm sure (that there is some gay gene which makes you gay) and numerous other arguments and the like, but the reason I only mentioned the 'gay gene' was because well, do you think it's possible to be the "only gay in the family"? So to speak, as in, you don't have any gay cousins or aunts/uncles who are gay or at least haven't ever come out. The reason I ask this is my mind started going as I was talking to a friend today and he told me how none of the people in his family are gay, not one. And it got me thinking...So what are your thoughts and opinions on the matter then guys? Do you think it's possible to be "the only gay in the family"? And lemme know if you are! I am really interested in this topic now.
     
    #1 McShuggles, Jun 20, 2014
  2. Aspen

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    No one in my mom's side of the family is gay. If they are, they're not out. To my knowledge, I'm the only non-heterosexual person here.

    My dad's side of the family is much more extensive to the point where I don't know quite a few of them so it's harder to say there. I know I have one distant cousin who is a lesbian.
     
    #2 Aspen, Jun 20, 2014
  3. Adder

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    None of my family are gay

    I think the reason why most people have a gay family member is mainly to do with statistics.

    If you think about it lots of studies have estimated between 3 and 9% of people are gay. If we take the middle value of 6% that shows us that 1 in 16.66 people is gay. When you add up all those great uncles, aunts and first cousins thrice removed you'll see that your extended family probably has way more than 16 people in it making not having a gay relation statistically unlikely.
     
    #3 Adder, Jun 20, 2014
  4. YuriBunny

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    Possible: yes
    Likely: no
     
    #4 YuriBunny, Jun 20, 2014
  5. Hyaline

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    I have a gay brother and at least one cousin on my biological fathers side.. my brother is a half brother on my moms side.. He also has an aunt that is likely a lesbian as well. so not sure what that says..
     
    #5 Hyaline, Jun 20, 2014
  6. Fallingdown7

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    I think I have one gay cousin, but that's it.
     
    #6 Fallingdown7, Jun 20, 2014
  7. supernova

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    I'm the only bi in my family... Or at least the only queer I know of...
     
    #7 supernova, Jun 20, 2014
  8. twosoups

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    I think my cousin could likely be bi. Everyone always thought my brother was gay in high school BC he was so effeminate, but until recently he was honestly the biggest playa I knew lol.
     
    #8 twosoups, Jun 20, 2014
  9. softbutch5765

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    The 'gay' gene has no solid scientific evidence yet. I still believe it's just some science crap trying to ease the minds of straights that being gay is inherited and an abnormality.
     
    #9 softbutch5765, Jun 20, 2014
  10. mangotree

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    If you're talking about family that is alive - then it's definitely possible to be the only one.
    Most living relatives are only on earth / in your life for 80ish years if they're lucky, so the odds of having another lgbtiq person in the family should be quite low - depending on the size of the family.
    There's a very high chance that deceased great / great-great uncle, aunt, grandmother, grandfather etc. was was lgbtiq but lived in a time/society that they couldn't tell anyone.

    Peace! (*hug*)
     
    #10 mangotree, Jun 20, 2014
  11. McShuggles

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    I mean it in just a general, sort of way, for example if somebody told you: "Nobody in my family is gay, none of my aunts, uncles or cousins are gay." But I suppose to keep it simple then yeah, I mean alive. It also begs to say that maybe nobody in the family has just come out of the closet, so to speak. Especially if it is a deeply religious family or whatnot - it just so happens the person who told me this has a Christian family, and has roots in Lebanon and France. Nonetheless, I just asked seeing as it is something that interests me. I find myself interested in wondering why people are gay; is it psychological? Predetermined at birth? Or something purely random? It's exciting and demoralizing at the same time to ponder.
     
    #11 McShuggles, Jun 20, 2014
  12. RainbowGreen

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    No one that I know of in my family from both sides is gay. Not a single one, and my family is quite big (14 aunts and uncles, 28 cousins, ect.). If someone is, they haven't come out.
     
    #12 RainbowGreen, Jun 20, 2014
  13. Clay

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    None in my family are, but then again I have an exceptional small family (9 people altogether).
     
    #13 Clay, Jun 20, 2014
  14. the lone wolf

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    It is very possible, I'm not though :grin:
     
    #14 the lone wolf, Jun 20, 2014
  15. McShuggles

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    Wow, that's surely a small family, ha! I have a giant family! Dunno the exact numbers, but my gran on my father's side has 24 grandchildren LOL! There is only 3 of us in both sides of my family (all my dads) who are LGBT, as far as I know.

    ---------- Post added 20th Jun 2014 at 08:00 PM ----------
    Mr. Know-it-all over here then, eh? :icon_wink
     
    #15 McShuggles, Jun 20, 2014
  16. neutron

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    I have one gay cousin on fathers side and one lesbian on mothers
     
    #16 neutron, Jun 20, 2014
  17. Chip

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    Almost always, when you poke around, you can find gay or lesbian people in your extended family somewhere. They may not be out or obvious, but family members generally know.

    It's certainly possible to be the only one, but not likely.
     
    #17 Chip, Jun 20, 2014
  18. Wolf123

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    My great uncle is gay. Besides that I don't believe so.
     
    #18 Wolf123, Jun 20, 2014
  19. GeekMonkey

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    Well nowadays families tend to be on the smaller side, so certain inherited genetic traits won't seem plainly inherited, because there just aren't enough people around to notice it.

    Then again for homosexuality there really isn't much evidence for there being a gay gene, or for it even having a large genetic component at all, twin studies and the like were rather disappointing for proponents of that hypothesis.

    That obviously does not mean that the alternative is " choice", especially since modern neuroscience sheds some doubt on the existence of free will in general.

    We have epigenetics, prenatal hormones and all kinds of other possible hypotheses.

    And even if it were something as unlikely as early childhood experiences or absence of a father figure or whatever the Freudians think it is, that doesn't make it any less natural nor any more of a choice.
    Not like you get to choose your environment, or like the social behaviour of the humans around you is " unnatural" - last time I checked we were part of nature.
     
    #19 GeekMonkey, Jun 21, 2014
  20. a1rborne

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    I'm the only gay in my family, or at least no one else is out. Two possibilities could be a cousin, who, to my knowledge, never had a girlfriend, and an uncle, who's a priest. Anyway, I happen to be the "only one" or "first" in my family in many other aspects, too :icon_wink
     
    #20 a1rborne, Jun 21, 2014
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