Hey guys and gals and all. So after a good long break with me and my bf, we got back together and I fixed almost all of my issues I had that had been hurting out relationship in the past, but I still have one thing I don't know how to fix... I jump to conclusions WAY too easily... Sometimes he'll just stop talking for a long time mid-conversation (hours gone even) and I'll be upset because things go through my mind like why is he ignoring me or did I do something wrong or is he okay. I jump to things too crazy and when he comes back it's just because his mom needed him, orrr he was thrown into a pool (xD a recent one actually). Just silly things that do actually make sense and I wouldn't need to go crazy about. I really need help fixing this, I'm stuck and I don't want to ruin our relationship for good...
I definitely know what you mean -- I know I've been that way in the past. I think in this case just acknowledging that this is something you do is really the key to improving. Since you know you have this tendency, the first thing to do is to try and keep those thoughts to yourself. In general I think it's a bad idea to hide your emotions, but if you know there's a good chance they're not based on reality it's probably for the best. At the very least maybe try and set a minimum time limit before you say anything confrontational when you start to feel that way -- chances are everything will be cleared up naturally before then and you'll be glad your intuition was wrong. Try to step back and look at the situation objectively. If you're in the middle of a conversation with someone that loves with you and he steps away, do you really think he randomly got so upset with you that he wouldn't even be willing to discuss it? I'm not saying it will always be smooth sailing, but I think if he's really bothered by something you'll know it for sure rather than having your mind race through a million different possibilities. There's a saying that the simplest explanation is usually the right one and I think that's pretty accurate. I remember some of your other threads -- I believe you said you made some kind of a stupid mistake or bad decision that led to you breaking up with your boyfriend. Since you just got back together with him and remember how painful it was to think that he was out of your life, I think it's only natural that you're walking on eggshells a little bit and are afraid of losing him again. Time will help you be a little bit calmer and more comfortable with your relationship. I doubt anything I've said is all that helpful, but I definitely know where you're coming from on this. You've got a good thing going though and are aware of the problem so I'm confident you can get past it. Good luck!
I agree with the above poster. Just wanted to add that maybe you could try and do some activities that distract you to prevent you from jumping to conclusions and worrying about those potential outcomes. Maybe watch an episode of your favourite tv show? Anyway. more often than not, the conclusions drawn would be contrary to reality. There's no need to worry too much
I really appreciate it. I definitely just need to throw my mine off of that stuff when it happens for sure. I'll try my best to not confront him unless I have proof something is wrong. Thanks!
