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I'm good enough to be her friend when she thought I was straight but not as a lesbian

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by stocking, Jun 21, 2014.

  1. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    So my friend who is female is distancing herself from me because I'm a lesbian well I think that's the reason . Ever since I came out to her she calls me less and textes me less but before I came out to her she constantly called me and text me , the last time she ever called me is when she had family trouble and needed someone to talk to , now I'm the only one initiating the textes and calls . I few weeks before I told her about my birthday party and asked her if she could come she said she will but on my birthday she never showed up , I had my birthday party before my birthday which is today . she never even had end told me she changed her mind or anything and I would never do anything like this .
     
  2. lionfood

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    Re: I'm good enough to be her friend when she thought I was straight but not as a les

    Happy birthday! :grin: :grin:

    I think sadly she's probably homophobic. I think the best thing you can do is confront her because maybe she doesn't realise she's doing it, but if you do, she might say hurtful things. Still, I think that's maybe better if you find out that's the reason she's doing it, even if it hurts, because at least you'll have closure on it. Or at least that's how I'd feel
     
  3. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    Re: I'm good enough to be her friend when she thought I was straight but not as a les

    thank you so much :slight_smile:

    I'm scared to but maybe we can talk about it we've know each other since high school
     
  4. Ghosting

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    Re: I'm good enough to be her friend when she thought I was straight but not as a les

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY and... I'm sorry that that's what's happening.

    Trying to look on a more positive side of things, it's also possible that she needs a bit of time to 'digest' the information.

    Even if people aren't homophobic, sometimes learning of a friend's (or close anyone) orientation when they previously assumed otherwise can cause a moment of pause in terms of just thinking about things... however 'irrational' or 'nonsense' the thoughts might be.

    Maybe she's wondering why you never said so sooner (does she feel like she should have known sooner since she was your friend?), maybe she herself is questioning, maybe she's wondering if you've been interested in her, maybe she's wondering if this will affect how your friendship will go in the future...

    Or maybe she might be homophobic.

    But I like your idea; if you've been friends this long, maybe you ought to try talking.

    I really wish you the best.
     
  5. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    Re: I'm good enough to be her friend when she thought I was straight but not as a les

    She did ask me if I ever liked her . thank you for the birthday wishes by the way
     
    #5 stocking, Jun 21, 2014
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2014