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How annoying do you find it when your friend don't reply?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by BearLover, Jun 22, 2014.

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  1. BearLover

    BearLover Guest

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    I have this guy I'm meeting up with soon, his name is Derry. Well we are going to be friends, he says he wants to have friends and isn't just looking for sex. We had a few conversations on skype and then one day he talks to me for a minute, then says I'm of out now, it was a 10 minute conversation and he said he was going out with other friends. It pissed me off knowing that he had priority of them over me, I had been wanting to talk to him for a little while then he goes offline.

    I now send him a message to ask him if we can talk and then I don't even get an answer, it really annoys me how he is so busy, he says he wants friends but is not even bothering to reply to what I say, I gave him my phone number and hasn't even texted me back, I said to him he could call me but never bothered.

    I get offended when someone doesn't reply to me, I feel as if I'm bugging them and they can't be bothered to reply to me, as if I'm just an annoyance that doesn't shut up. I have had friends that just look at my message and say nothing. It makes me feel like they don't care.

    If he truly wanted a friendship then we would remember to text me, it seems as if I'm at the back of his mind. I don't love him, he's not a lover yet and don't think he will be, he's a gay guy but doesn't want a relationship. It sounds as if he wants to just have sex but he said he only wants a friendship.

    He lives quite a few miles away from me so we can't meet up so often. I see that people are busy and maybe I'm overreacting but surely a true friend that would want to see you would text you to see how you are etc.
     
    #1 BearLover, Jun 22, 2014
  2. dapulu

    dapulu
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    It's annoying, but not as annoying as when someone I like ignores me.

    It's crap talk the thing about friends I guess. Be careful with how insistent you area because you may come off as too strong or clingy, and that may scare him off. I'd stop trying contacting him, and only mirror what he does in the "friendship"

    Good luck.
     
    #2 dapulu, Jun 22, 2014
  3. stocking

    stocking Guest

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    I'm going through the same thing right now and it annoys the hell out of me . I agree with the other poster treat him like how he's treating you
     
    #3 stocking, Jun 22, 2014
  4. McShuggles

    McShuggles
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    I completely agree with the posters above. And I am also in the same position. The thing is we do talk everyday, I even get good morning texts from him, it's just trying to keep the conversation with him as he'll suddenly just stop replying. He said he just doesn't like texting when he's busy and/or with people and I completely understand that so I don't push it on him obviously. But it's absolutely infuriating, as he doesn't give me a text to let me know he's not gonna reply - which is maybe something I ask too much of, but is something I do myself to all my friends and would greatly appreciate in return.
     
    #4 McShuggles, Jun 23, 2014
  5. Idris

    Idris
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    I agree with everyone. I mirror my friends actions now, after realizing that my issue was that I automatically attached to a friend and thought that they were a best friend, but in reality they didn't want that from me and likely were overwhelmed by my attempts for a closer friendship. I came off way too strong, and it didn't help that my anxiety amplified it, making me seem clingy and needy when I wasn't trying to be. Just see how he responds and reacts and then mirror his actions. I do that with friends and it's seeming to work.
     
    #5 Idris, Jun 30, 2014
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