Okay, first things first, I'm new here so hello everyone! A bit of info before we begin. Me --> 15 years old. Female. Pan/Bisexual. My crush (lets call her M) --> also 15 & female. However she's Muslim & questioning... I think. Onto the actual point of this thread. Without all of the details it's probably a topic so many of you have seen before. Yup, it's the whole 'straight crush' scenario. But here's the twist with this, I told M I liked her in the August of last year... And at this point it went nowhere apart from the fact that she said she would have asked me out if she wasn't Muslim. For the sake of keeping this as short as possible I'll skip some details and fast forward to this year. We got a lot closer and then one day in class she asked me "what would happen if we were together?" and after a fairly deep and drawn out conversation, she labelled herself as pansexual & we ended up dating... For a grand total of 5 days. I ended it because she was avoiding me & because we're best friends it sucked. I'd rather be just friends than miss out on her utterly amazing being. So we went back to normal almost instantaneously. Since then there's been a lot more physical contact (hugs, random cheek kisses etc) and conversations that 'just friends' wouldn't have. I think she still may be interested but she has a boyfriend (who she isn't really happy with) and not to mention that she can be really affectionate one day and cold as ice the next. Despite this though, I reallyreally love her and would do anything to have her back. We've been through more together than most kids our age and my feelings towards her are genuine. Any advice/thoughts on this situation would be highly appreciated! I apologize for the essay & thank you for reading if you have. ~R0xx(!)
If you're still interesting in pursuing a relationship with her, you should sit down and talk with her sometime about where you two are at, what you think about your relationship, and whether you'd both be wiling to give it a second try. Communication with her is key! If you poke around and talk with her, make sure that you are respectful of her current relationship. Stealing someone's girlfriend is kind of rude, yanno? I also urge you to take your relationship slowly. It's easy for people your age to be sucked into a relationship, so you should make sure that you're not moving at too quick a pace.
I think the only real issue here is that she hasn't fully accepted the fact that she's at least bi. Even if you feel sure enough to lable yourself as one thing, acting on it is a whole other story. From being a state of mind and a feeling, abstract, it gets physical and real. That can scare the shit out of most people. I think you should talk to her, mabey try dating or something, and absolutely not rushing, at all. If the pattern of avoidance repeats itself, talk with her, properly, before making any decisions. You can date without being physical at all for a starter, just to get her used to the idea of being together with a person of the same sex. Well, just my two cents! Think about it and decide based on what's best for you! Good luck!
Thanks to both of you guys (TJ & Rumpletubb) for your inputs! I'm definitely going to speak to her sooner or later & I'll keep both of your comments in mind! Sorry for the lack of a proper response, not sure if there's an option that will work with my phone haha
I feel you, phones suck when writing longer messages. Sounds like you've made some kind of decision, and that's great! Just be cool about it and all the stuff we wrote! Give us a small update on how you proceeded and how it went! Best of luck to you!
So it seems her current relationship is going better than she makes out. I guess I'm just gonna leave her to it. Any advice on getting over someone? >-<
