Found Out HS Friend Is Out and Partnered

I was reading an article in a local paper this morning and I saw a high school friend I've lost touch with in one of the pictures. It was highlighting the marriages that were happening due to the state's statute against gay marriage being struck down.

I had attended her first wedding when she got married to a guy we both went to school with. My sister had mentioned about a year ago that she thought this old friend of mine might be a lesbian. My response at that time was, "I haven't spoken to her in a few years, but if she is good for her for having the courage to be authentic. "

I knew she had gotten divorced, but didn't know she had found a partner and had a baby til today. I was just so happy for her looking at the pictures and reading their story.

Before I had any real concept of the fact that I was gay, I had a "crush" on her in high school. She is a beautiful woman, but I was definitely more in love with the idea of a "happily ever after" than actually being attracted to her physically. She shared with me at one point that she'd had a "crush" on me as well.

It's just kind of funny to me that we were friends who "crushed" on each other yet we were each deep in our own closets. Our friendship waned as college progressed. I just figured she thought we'd grown apart as friends as she stopped responding to me when I would reach out to her. I kind of wonder now whether she was coming to terms with being a lesbian and pushing away people she thought would be judgemental. She knew I was Catholic and very involved in the church at the time.

I just kind of want to say, "I know we've lost touch, I just want you to know I am very happy for you."

Having been out of touch for so long though, I am a bit reticent to send that message.

 

I ended up sending it. Best case, it's just a nice note. Worst case, it might resolve any doubts she may have had when we were friends about whether I would accept her. Then again, she may never see it as I haven't seen her online in a LONG time.

It still feels good that I at least made the attempt.

 

I don't think I consciously believed I was gay when we were friends, but it's possible she had her suspicions. I think the last time we spoke was either at her first wedding reception or at our 5 Year HS class reunion. Funny how memories sort of run together.