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Should I keep contact?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Budweiser, Aug 8, 2014.

  1. Budweiser

    Full Member

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    This is a complicated situation. Basically I played a virtual reality game where I pretended to be a gay guy because doing so was sexually exciting (I know, I suck for lying to people).

    To make a long story very, very short... this guy and I developed a very unique relationship. I let him assume I was a guy and otherwise did not lie about myself. I helped him through a very dark time in his life and he grew very fond of me, as I did him. We're 30 years apart in age but the avatars and the game let us transcend that in a way.

    I never felt romantically in love with this man, but he was and still is very special to me. My heart went out to him with all of his struggles and he helped me explore some deeper parts of myself, and I'm generally a better person for having met him.

    He does not get the chance to go on the game anymore and I have actually quit. I kept contact strictly to the game because I did not want months of lying to turn into years of lying.

    He has given me his email address and I am very temped to email him... I do not ever plan to tell him the truth, because I have been a very good thing for him and he has suffered enough heart break. It would make him very happy to hear that I am doing well and I want to know what's going on with him, too.

    So I'm asking, would it be a bad thing to email him anonymously after all we've been through? It is a very unusual situation, but the emotion and the way we've touched each other's lives is completely real. Would I be a better person if I just cut him off, though?

    Thanks so much for input and advice!
     
  2. Robins Jacket

    Regular Member

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    Cutting him off would not be advisable considerening the circumstances of him being emotionally unstable. The only thing you could do now to make it right is to tell him the truth. If he assumed were a gay male then hopefully he didn't verbalized his assumptions and making them obvious. Even if he did though, he still deserves the truth. I know it's hard to tell the truth (believe me, I have my share of lies) but it will save the both of you so much trouble. You also should tell him that you're not interested an view him as more of a very good friend (if that's the case). It's up to you which you decide to tell first though. You also should mention the reason why you didn't tell him earlier on.
    I hope this was at least a bit helpful.
    I send love and luck to you sweetie! <3 xoxo