I have this best friend which is really homophobic. A while ago he had dream about this one girl he had a "crush" on. He didn't knew her at at all, and I told him how silly this crush was. Some weeks later he told me he was completely over the crush, not finding her interesting anymore. The problem is, a few days ago he told me he had a dream about having gay sex with me. He told me that he wasn't gay and that he would kill himself if he was. I told him I didn't have any problems with him having sexual dreams about me. In fact I have a gay crush on him, but I am afraid to tell him because he is so homophobic. So I wonder, him having sexual dreams about me; does that mean he has sexual feeling for me in his subconscious without knowing or admitting? And him telling me about the dream, is that his way to see how I would react? Or his kind of way to say that he is sexual attracted to me? Or am I just over analyzing things? I was just wondering because we are really close and touchy feely with each other. And some part of me believe or at least hope that he is closed and in denial about his orientation. He told me that he only have had sexual related dreams twice, one about this old crush, and one about me, if that helps....
I don't think that the dream he had means anything serious, it maybe just happened. I had few times dreams that involved my same sex friends that I really don't find in any way attractive. I think that you shouldn't tell to your friend if he's that homophobic. Sorry. :hug:
I wouldn't take much notice of dreams to be honest. What other things has he said that makes you think he's homophobic? was it just that he would hate himself if he we was gay? It sounds little bit like he does want to talk about sexuality in general - not just about the two of you. Might be worth brining up LGBT matters with him more and see if you can find out where he really stands on the subject. By the way, how old are the two of you? It usually doesn't make a difference, but if you're teenagers ... well ... it's a highly hormonal stage of life.
Well the fact that he told you about it makes me wonder a little..... he might be thinking about you but he's ashamed and scared of it. I'd tread very lightly though, and definitely don't bring up the subject. If anything is going to happen, wait for him to say something not you.
That sounds really awkward for any friend to admit having a sexual dream about you. It sounds extreme and kind of melodramatic for him to say he would kill himself if he was gay. Remember that homophobia is learned, so maybe he is living in a very conservative environment. I agree that you should try to be there for him if he wants to talk about it. It's hard to tell if you or he should bring up the subject, but I have a feeling he might continue.
