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confused if he is interested and how I should go about this.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by joeking, Sep 23, 2014.

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  1. joeking

    joeking
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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    First things first- I am not out to anyone. I am in college 21 years old never been in a relationship with anyone before... guy or girl. I want a relationship with another man really bad.
    I work at the recreational gym at my college. While there, I have seen many attractive guys. One guy in particular I was not necessarily attracted to until he started making small talk with me while I was at work. He would smile and it seemed as though it was kind of flirting. Anyway I started getting attracted to him then I hear from one of my Co workers that he made an sexual advance to one of my female Co workers.
    After I heard this I basically told myself that he was just being friendly with me. However later he adds me on FB. Recalls conversation from long ago that I didn't even remember until thinking more about it.
    I told him once how I burned some food. Then tells me how he would like to show me sometime. And smiles. I kind of ignored it and changed the subject. A few days later he invites me to this event that he was going to. I show up after looking up the location online. To which it was different from what he told me. I went kind of late but couldn't find him. I messaged him on fb just to let him know I went.He messaged back saying he forgot that the location changed. I messaged back letting him know that I tried looking for him. He didn't message back. I haven't seen him since.
    It is so frustrating trying to guess who is attracted to me and who isn't. My thinking was once I found the right guy and settled it would be the best time to come out. I don't know if this guy is attracted to me. Tell me how I should go about this situation. Being that I only see him while I am at work I don't want to behave inappropriately. Plus if he isn't gay I don't want everyone at work to find out I am gay.
    What is the safest and most effective way to go about this. Bottom line I want to find out from him if he is attracted. I just want to know how to go about doing this.
     
    #1 joeking, Sep 23, 2014
  2. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    Next time you see him at work, force an explanation out of him about the whole “date” thing and why he didn’t reply. Obviously, do this when you two are in privacy.

    Next step would be to take the initiative and ask him out instead.

    Show some interest in him, his personal life, even his exercise regimen (maybe suggest something or ask for his opinion).

    If you are worried about doing stuff at work, you have the added benefit of having him as a friend on Facebook. But since he is ignoring you there (might be ashamed that he messed the date), you really should confront him and ease his mind (tell him it’s okay that you two didn’t meet or something), and then talk about the other stuff.

    Maybe, try helping him out at the gym, some accidental body contact can’t hurt.
     
    #2 shinji, Sep 23, 2014
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