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I think my friend is bi, but im not sure.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by hopefulguy, Sep 30, 2014.

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  1. hopefulguy

    hopefulguy
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    Sexual Orientation:
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    I think my friend,let's call him josh (guy) is bi but I only think he is.. he hasn't told me he is, but some of the things he said were questionable.. like the other night, my other friend called him gay (like 99% of of guys in high school) and josh was like "no I'm bi... Just kidding just kidding" and he today said something that could have been an accident but it sounded like a slipup to me. One of my friends asked who he dated and he said "usually girls" and then quickly said "I mean always girls". Idk.. but anyways. I've asked him if he was gay before, but he always said he wasn't gay, he liked girls. Also, he doesn't know I'm bi. Idk if I should tell him though, because if he isn't then, that could get really awkward. So i think it would be best to know for sure before I decided to tell him or nah. But I don't know how to figure out without telling him. He also does other stuff that I'm not sure if he's joking, serious, or whatever. Like asking questions like "if u were a girl what guys would you go for" and stuff. Thanks to anyone who decides to help me out!! (!) :icon_bigg
     
    #1 hopefulguy, Sep 30, 2014
  2. dapulu

    dapulu
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    If you're just coming out to him, then no worries there :slight_smile:

    It's a lot easier to open to someone who's in a similar situation than you and admits it openly.

    Good luck :slight_smile:
     
    #2 dapulu, Sep 30, 2014
  3. CuriousArticles

    CuriousArticles
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    Maybe take to bringing up some LGBT topics, and show your support for them? Then he know's you're okay with it, and you can see he is, and go from there. It might then be easier to come out to him or for him to come out to you.

    As dapulu said, it's easier to open up when someone else admits it first, just remember, that if you really want to know you have to make the first steps and be brave, with no expectations that he will open up too (especially immediately).

    My experience of being taken my surprise is to clam up, but open up later, because you know it'll be okay. But if you lead into it, and he kind of sees it coming, he might actually say something.

    Hope this helps! :slight_smile:
     
    #3 CuriousArticles, Sep 30, 2014
  4. shinji

    shinji Guest

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    Start "playing" his game. Next time he says something "questionable" just say this:

    "Really? Well then we should totally start going out."

    or

    "Is that so? Why don't you become my boyfriend then."

    or

    "Yeah, she's cute but not as much as you."

    The thing with such statements is that you could always brush them off as jokes and yet, they can be quite serious... depending on how you want them to come out. Copious amounts of sarcasm, helps!

    I hope you get the basic idea? Instead of "coming out" to him, just be more flirty and let him "come to you". This guy seems like he might in fact be (at the very least) bi/bi-curious.

    It's not a very good idea, pressuring him to "label" himself. Or even worse, labeling him yourself by asking if he is gay.
     
    #4 shinji, Oct 1, 2014
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