Ever had a crush on sraight/gay or otherwise unattainable, friend?

I have a crush on my straight best friend. She's absolutely gorgeous and amazing and it hurts because I can't have her. :tears:

I get all warm and fuzzy and :love: when I'm around her and I fantasize about her a lot.

I don't really know what to do about it...

So yeah, you're not alone lol

 

Same lol, just posted a thread about it, it sucks and I think it happens to a lot of us.

 

I fell head over heels for my straight college roommate of two years, most horrifically euphoric time of my life. It's one thing to crush on someone from afar, but I never had that "out of sight, out of mind" luxury. I'm usually very good at hiding my feelings, but truly, I'd never been so terrified of exposing myself. I thought I was going to explode.

She graduated and it's been a couple of months since I've seen her, but seldom does my mind drift to anything but her throughout the day. Never have I felt so deeply about anything or anyone, she truly consumed my soul.

 

Yes. After visiting this forum for the first time, it seems like every single LGBT person has to go through this at least once.

 

I have, and I've also had crushes who were unattainable for other reasons, like they just weren't interested in me in particular.

Whatever the reason, it's always a difficult thing to deal with. You can't really just turn feelings off for a person. What I have learned over time though, is that you can direct those feelings to be whatever you most need them to be. I have had people I loved very deeply, but it could never be romantic. So when those feelings of love came up, I would associate them with platonic aspects, and remind myself that pining over the lost romance would just hurt me and maybe even the person I liked.

With some of these people, we just drifted apart. With others, the firey "crush" feelings mellowed out in to deep feelings of friendship. And once, only once in my lifetime, the crush came to be interested in me at a later point and we had a very brief and enjoyable fling .

To be clear I am talking about crushes I could not have for some reason. There are crushes who crushed back, and those turned in to various sorts of relationships. Some were great, some were painful, and some were both.

 

I'm pretty sure that every single person on this forum has gone through this at some point. I'm pretty sure that almost EVERYONE has gone through this at some, no matter their orientation. Don't worry, you're not alone. We've all been through this.

 

I think it's a common trend for LGBTQ people to have a crush on a straight/otherwise unattainable friend. I know that right now I've got a hopeless crush on a boy on my cross-country team. He's a close friend, and I'm out to him, but he doesn't know that I like him (which shows that he's even more clueless than I am, because I don't think I've exactly been subtle). But yeah, he's got a girlfriend as of last week, and I'm pretty sure he's not interested, even though he sort of "acts gay" (Know what I mean?) sometimes. Although when I said I had no chance with the guy I liked, he did say, "You never know."

 

I used to have a crush on my best friend long before he came out of the closet. I still find him attractive and his personality charming but I doubt I would have expressed my feelings to him.

Not just because I value his friendship but I don't see us going very far in a relationship.

 

I've been into a friend of mine for almost a year now.. I'll never tell her cause she's straight. :/ I've got it bad, maaan

 

I think my best friend is the must cute, nicest, and kindest person in the entire world. Along with having a swimmers body and these amazing brown hazel eyes. Hell he is saving money up so he can get his go eye surgery like wtf how can u get any cuter. I am head over heals and it sucks.

 

Yes.
Goodness yes.
The worst part is when you start questioning everything they say and do. Like 'they did X, Y, and Z, does that mean they like me?' Obsessing over every little detail. I'm doing it right now myself, even though I know it's not healthy.
Sometimes I wonder if it's a blessing or a curse that she goes to a different university. She stayed the weekend last week, and the last time I saw her she kept saying she didn't want me to leave. And I'm just sitting here like 'You're killing me.'

 

Yup. Also goin through that right now. He loves to tell everyone how straight he is...but with me he is very intimate, touchy. Told me he likes to lie about stuff...not that he likes it, but that it just comes out. Tons of little hints he throws out that says he likes me and that's what keeps me hooked. He's a terrible drug.

As flirtatious and confusing as he is he's expressed his wish to communicate better with me. Have we laid the groundwork? Sure. Does that mean he's into me? No...

As of now he's straight and unattainable. I'm dying to know if that'll change.

 

This situation is common. The crush may unknowingly play mind games with you. They may even do way gay stuff with you, and yet won't be gay or ready to come out or whatever. It's happened several threads at EC where the crush turned out to not be gay and everyone was shocked.

As for myself, I have a love for one of my close friends. Now, I know he's straight, but hypothetically, if he was gay, I would marry him hardcore

 

story of my life...

 

I also think this is the hardest part of being gay / bi, at least for people who live in societies that don't burn LGBT's on the stake or something.

For me at least, it's just heartwrecking that I can be neither a truly best friend to the person I consider my best friend, nor can my love for the love of my life ever be reciprocated.

 

I've never had a crush on a straight friend really, but an unattainable one, yes. Trust me, it really does suck, but once you move on you feel so much better.