I'll preface this by saying that we meet when I was 18, about to turn 19 and he was 23. We play the same game so we started to talk and group quite a bit, it's a small community with an even smaller percentage of homosexuals or other deviants. A few months went by and we fell for each other. We send pictures (not dick pics), talk in the phone, use voice chat, we've spoken with each others friends and family, his mother actually told him to marry me. Though around 8 months ago, before valentine's day, he dumped me for his ex. He even told me to not talk to him until he cements his relationships with him and that it was my fault for encouraging him to not lose a friend. Though I was hurt, he is still young so changing one's mind is the glory of youth, that and not considering every consequence. About 2 months ago, a mutual friend said that instead of letting myself become an embarrassing memory of his youthful days, to talk to him again since he missed me. He said he still loved me, we got together again but he seems to doubt that I could possibly love him. He is quite muscle-y, plays quite a few instruments, reads math books for fun, worked when he was 16 to support his family and is quite personable. I'm somewhat short, weigh 230 pounds, charismatic in my own way, somewhat intelligent and a loner. Quite honestly, it is somewhat shocking he feels I say I love him only to make him feel better. I suspect it's due to me not being as tethered to the physical world. I'd be hard pressed to describe or draw myself and regularly dream as others. I tend to identify others as feelings and sounds rather than sacks of meat. Due to that I believe he feels his body and income are not enough to woo me. While true, I love him for more than that. I compliment him, spend time with him, even sent him chocolates that he wanted but couldn't buy due to his 'diet'. We are meeting in 2 months and he is moving in July. Apologies if it's not quite as cohesive as it might have been, and I couldn't find a good way to end it, but I love him. I'll always love my first love, not just for showing me I could love, but for bringing me such happiness even if I'm he realizes I'm not his. ---------- Post added 6th Oct 2014 at 09:34 PM ---------- Today was specially hard and I just needed to write it down. I apologize for those whose eyes and brain I've damaged.
