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So, I have this friend...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Polterpup, Oct 14, 2014.

  1. Polterpup

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    And I just found out he's gay. Um...so, from what I've head it wasn't supposed to come out the way it did. Or at all. I dunno, but his 'rents are trying to keep it a secret. I found out from the last person I'd expect to have this information so I went snooping around to verify it...and it seems to be legit. Now, I've always had a hunch...he really, in my opinion, just didn't seem all that interested in girls. I would know, I dated him. Hey! That's kinda funny. We dated and then we both turned out to be gay. Weird, right? Anyhoo, I want to tell him I know. But I know that I really shouldn't. I've tried to kinda bring up LGBT topics, but he hasn't said anything about himself. I just thought that he may want to talk about it with someone who has an understanding. But I shouldn't tell him I know, right? Because that might put him in an awkward place? And what else could I do to make him feel a little bit better about this?
     
  2. Sek

    Sek
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    It's nice you want to reassure him, but you shouldn't rush him if he definitely is gay. Does he know of your sexuality? If he doesn't, telling him will let him know you're someone he can talk to. DON'T confront him about it and call him out to his face, being forced out of the closet rarely happens stress-free.

    For now I'd probably say to give him a few chances (not too many, you don't want him to suspect you) to open up about it by bringing LGBT topics up like you have before. Make sure he has enough time to come to terms with it and be comfortable with it. :slight_smile:
     
  3. Polterpup

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    He knows that I'm gay. It feels really...awkward that I know about him and he doesn't know I know. I dunno, is that normal? Or am I just being weird?
     
  4. Sek

    Sek
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    Of course it's normal. You feel that it's something you shouldn't know because you didn't hear it from him, so it's natural to feel awkward/weird about that. Whether you should act on it or not, I'd say not to. Let him have the chance to come out himself.