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Parents preventing me from joining LGBT+ club

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by sociallyawkward, Oct 14, 2014.

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  1. sociallyawkward

    sociallyawkward
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    I'm a closeted grey-pansexual. I was hoping that I could join my highschool's lgbt+ club because I'll definitely be able to come out to all of those who are in the club and I really want to be part of such a loving and supportive community. I was supposed to attend my first meeting today but my mother found out that it was a lgbt+ club and refused to give me a ride home if i went. well she didn't outright refuse, first she just blatantly lied. earlier, I asked my mom if she could pick me up late after school for a club meeting (she didn't know the club at the time) and she said that it would be no problem at all. when she found out that it was the GSA she told me last minute that "something" had come up. she wouldn't elaborate at all. I tried to compromise by telling her that she could just pick me up when she was done but she would have none of it. after I pestered her for a bit I got her to tell me the truth. she just said that she was "unsure" about this club and wanted time to think it over and find out "what they do." she also wants to contact the directer of the club and talk it over with my father who is like hardcore conservative (i don't know his stand on lgbt+ rights but he watches freaking fox news). I mean my mother's reaction could have definitely have been worse but I'm still deeply saddened by it. at least she didn't ban the possibility of joining the club completely. I might still be able to persuade her and my father to let me join. Do you have any advice.
     
    #1 sociallyawkward, Oct 14, 2014
  2. resu

    resu
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    You need to be careful, but if you explain to your mom this is a safe club and sponsored by your school, it may help reassure her. Of course, it's kind of dangerous since you're not out, but try to talk with the GSA director yourself about your situation; they may have experience on how to handle this situation.
     
    #2 resu, Oct 14, 2014
  3. sociallyawkward

    sociallyawkward
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    Ok thanks. I'm hoping that since I have already shown my views about LGBT+ rights and acceptance to my parents, that they will just believe I want to join the GSA as an ally. I'm definitely no where near coming out to them though. If they ask about my orientation i'm probably just gonna lie and say straight. Talking with the directer is a good idea. My mom said she wanted to get in touch with him so maybe I can use that in my favor. He might be able to explain and get them to understand that the club is a friendly and supportive group to join. I'll try and explain my views on everything the best I can without making them angry. I still don't fully understand their views on LGBT+ rights either, except for the fact that they act kinda uncomfortable whenever someone brings it up. Thanks!
     
    #3 sociallyawkward, Oct 14, 2014
  4. ajsivy

    ajsivy
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    i do hope you are able to join i always look forward to going to meetings in my school (also this may be bad advice but well thats me for you but maybe you can go and get a friend to take you home or do you have late busses). Anyway i hope they let you go the meeting i have gone to so far have been great.
     
    #4 ajsivy, Oct 14, 2014
  5. ChameleonSoul

    ChameleonSoul
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    I think what you should do depends completely on your mother's reaction after talking to the GSA director. If it goes over well, then everything will be normal and you can join the GSA without raising your parents' suspicions. If things don't go so well with your mother, I'd see if you could make any arrangements with a friend who could give you a ride home after the meeting. Your mother won't be able to control whether you go to the meeting if you find a way around the measures she takes. I really hope you can go to the meetings, though. I, along with every person I talked to, feels a sense of relief and safety when a part of their GSA and I think it's one of the most valuable an LGBT teen can have. Good luck with your mother and know that even if things don't work out, realize that it gets better.
     
    #5 ChameleonSoul, Oct 14, 2014
  6. sociallyawkward

    sociallyawkward
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    Thanks. I think that's what i'll do. I mean, i might just be worrying for nothing and my mom might be perfectly fine with me going after she talks to the directer. And if she still refuses to give me a ride I think it would be the best idea if I could make arrangements with a friend. I do have some friends in GSA who I don't really know that well yet but could potentially drive me home if i explained my situation. I really hope that I can join!

    ---------- Post added 14th Oct 2014 at 09:27 PM ----------
    I don't think my school has late buses but a friend might be able to bring me home. Thanks for your advice :slight_smile:
     
    #6 sociallyawkward, Oct 14, 2014
  7. love dont judge

    love dont judge
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    i agree with everyone else that maybe you could find a friend to ide home with. hopefully after ur mom talks to the director, and feels beter about it. although, just cause ur joiningba GSA, it doesnt necessarily mean ur LGBT+. in this case it does, but GSA literally stands for gay straight alliance. i really hope u get to go, as i know what its like to not have one available. its pointless for me to try, since everyone in it except me would be straight. i hate small schools. but i hope ur mom turns around after talking to the director. good luck
     
    #7 love dont judge, Oct 14, 2014
  8. sociallyawkward

    sociallyawkward
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    Yeah. Thank you. Oh and the GSA isn't actually called the GSA anymore, It's called the "insert school mascot here" pride club. It was changed because they wanted it to seem more open and wanting for it to seem limited to only those who identify as gay or straight. It's still for people of all identities and orientations. Thanks again :slight_smile:
     
    #8 sociallyawkward, Oct 15, 2014
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