So im in college & a few weeks ago i saw this cute girl, later that day she came up to me and asked if i was gay, but i said no because i hadnt come out yet! Sh*t. Then because i was a little drunk and nervous i proceeded into this stupid thing about how i think theres a scale and i dont believe in labels (i dont even care.) i was just trying to hint subtly to her that im not straight but now im worried i scared her off.. So i added her online and invited her to an event but she blew me off last minute. It doesn't look like she uses online that much but ive been kinda worrying that maybe i was a bit stupid because i was nervous and i like her. BTW since then ive totally accepted im gay and i love being gay. Ive also started coming out to friends. So i sent her a message just saying like how are u, that was days ago and still no response although she doesnt go online very much so maybe she hasnt seen it yet. Should i send another message and say like im sorry if i was weird when we first met and that im actually gay? Or should i wait. The waitings driving me insane.
I get you girl, waiting is hard. But if I was you I would relax and talk to her in person, she would be much more open and it's much less likely that she would blow you off (doesn't sound like she will though). So, just relax, enjoy this time where you're accepting yourself, you'll meet lots of girls. It's always better in person girl, you'll get to actually see her reaction and everything, hang in there.
The fact she asked if you were gay might be a good sign. Perhaps she is interested in you, maybe she was just curious, who knows. I'd just say to back off a bit, don't expect conversations but try to initiate them. Keep it to a friendly hello when you see her, have some smalltalk and drop a few subtle compliments that might lead into greater conversation - eg complimenting her tastes can be a great way to show interest and open up more dialog. Just give it time.. don't go too fast, then she might feel a bit weird. Also, don't overthink it! It might come across when you talk. You want to give off an impression of being calm and unphased, but interested. Desperate is rarely attractive. EDIT: it's also good to leave an element of mystery about you, falling in love is much about discovering each other and when you only reveal small parts about yourself at a time the other person tends to want more and more, and then feels even better about finding things about you. TL;DR - Don't overdo it, take it slow.
thanks for the advice guys, made me feel a bit more chill about it, ill probs see her at some point anyways, it may be a few weeks but ill let u know how it goes
