OK. Hi. Haven't been here in over a year (what happened to TheEdend!? Dude was cool as heck), but I'm back and I NEED ADVICE/someone to tell me to stop over thinking things! So I had my first date EVER with a guy. Pretty much we met a certain dating app (don't judge.), so naturally I was REALLY hesitant about him, but he seemed genuinely attracted to me, a total sweetheart, genuinely cool guy, etc. So a day or so after meeting, we metup for what ended up being an official first date. I was nervous at first, which he realized and commented on, but after the first half hour, all that nervousness went away. We talked a lot about ourselves, where we want to go in life, etc. We also talked about our sexualities, and he knows I'm not out to my family, and he's 110% ok with that. During that time, I realized I had nothing to worry about; this incredibly attractive guy is attracted to me, was actually glad to have finally met me. And I realized that, while talking to him, I'm also incredibly attracted to him and was glad I decided to meet him; he's smart, really kind, funny, knows what he wants out of life. He's exactly the man I could fall for. Somewhere along the way, we both admitted an attraction to eachother. We said some things in the heat of the moment, like "you're mine now" and even the word boyfriend was brought up at least once. But we both realized that it was in the heat of the moment, because at the end as we were going home, we both acknowledged that we shouldn't jump into a serious relationship; so we're starting off as friends and seeing where we can go from there. Which I can deal to a certain extent, but it has brought up some old insecurities of mine, such as he's not as attracted to me as I thought, I'll be alone, won't find anyone, etc. And I'm a total closet romantic. I grew up on the Disney classics, so I believe in happily ever afters, the concept of soul mates, love at first sight, etc. No one has ever expressed genuine attraction for me before, and it took me by complete surprise how obviously attracted he was to me (he may or may not have popped a boner when we held hands haha), and when he called me beautiful I actually believed it and holy hell did it make my night. Naturally, old insecurities combined with all these new feelings that I've NEVER felt before are somewhat overwhelming me, and the more I think about it, the more I feel like I've fallen for him already, perhaps more than I should have. I really want to see him again, to hold his hand and just BE with him. But like I said, old insecurities; I'm nervous he wasn't as into me as I thought, that he just wants to be my friend, and i'll be back at square one: single. I know that's crazy, irrational thinking though; we still text (not as frequently as we did, and they're more casual texts than romantic/suggestive like they were when we first started talking), we MIGHT be hanging out now that his midterms are done and over with, and he straight up told me he had no regrets whatsoever about our date and yes, there's a possibility for a second date. TLDR; I have no idea what I'm doing and it terrifies me. What do I do?
Congrats!!!!!!! u had such an amazing date Dont worry about it, just let it be. Hes into you so just let things happen :eusa_danc
Going slow is good. If he weren't attracted to you, there'd be an overt sign not some covert one your imagining. It's all good. Get to know him. He might have some big flaw you could learn about too late if you go too fast. ;]
Wow that sounds like an awesome first date. I think you did everything right and have no reason to worry. If I were you I would tell him about his comment making your night that would make him happy and show that you are really interested. You guys sound really cute and you are right not too rush too much. Goodluck!
Yeah, I told him the date meant more to me then he could ever imagine, and that I was glad he was genuinely interested in wanting to meet me for something other then sex. He was glad I felt that way and had no regrets about the date. But I'm starting to feel like that's it for us. The messages we'd send eachother went from being frequent and sweet to not very often and incredibly casual. I could deal with rejection (somehow) if he were to say no, but it's kind of frustrating that all that was said and done only for me to be left hanging; especially because it's someone who genuinely made me feel validated as a person emotionally and physically. IDK, I'm trying not to think about it too much, though.
Jealous!! He sounds great. Definitely take it slow, the best relationships are those that are long-lasting and are always interesting. When you rush in too fast it leaves little to say later on. Don't be nervous about it ending. That's totally normal but do your best to keep any sort of contact between you. I've had relationships end before where I was too nervous to initiate conversations so the other person got bored, and our relationship turned into nothing.. Maybe even try inviting him to see a film or something?
