Spoiler I've already ranted on my tumblr but I feel like doing this again here. I know it's only been a few months since I've joined this website but I can say that people have greatly helped me go through with my life. I usually don't give much fuss about my birthday but for this year, I honestly don't want to celebrate it at all. I've been such a terrible person and no matter how people tell me how I’m super nice and sweet, I still cannot accept that. My self-worth is slowly diminishing and I honestly do not know what's the next step for me. The main reason why I joined this website was to ask an advice about my break up with my ex-boyfriend. I know I mention him a lot of times on numerous thread but he has really been the person who was there for me 100% of the time. In the past 5 months, I have been depressed about the break up as well as my Avoidant Personality Disorder and contemplated on suicide many times. I just have a lot of guilt carrying behind my back and I do not know how to repay back the shitty things I've done to him. I guess it's easy to say that life goes on and you should move on from it but it's pretty hard for someone you were so attached to for a 3 year long distance relationship and for that person to travel all the way to Europe and who wasted many and argued with his parents, dropped college just to see me and what do I give back in return? I lied to him and have been really selfish. I've wasted his time for me and that is something I can never pay back in return so I'm desperate to make things right this time for him and for me. I'm 23 now and all I want for my birthday is for this year to be over. I'm not sure why I'm writing this but I just wanted this to get out off my chest and. tl;dr I'm 23 and lots of regrets in the past and idk what to do with my life and shit.
Happy birthday, tulipinacup! Are you gonna have a cake? ('Cause if you are, save me some, okay?) Hope all your fantastical dreams come true!
I'm sorry you're feeling so sad on your birthday. If you don't want to celebrate, that's ok. You may have done things you regret, and maybe you won't be able to make up for them all, but they're all in the past. Year number 23 is a chance to start fresh. I hope it ends up being a better year for you. And I know you don't want to make a fuss, but here's a birthday hug (*hug*) Hope you feel better soon.
Well, first of all, happy birthday. You may have regrets, and avoidant feelings, but you come across as quite a likeable person on here. I hope it will be a better year for you!
First off.. Happy birthday.. I am sorry you are feeling a little down, I hope you do manage to find a way to still make it a good day. I know the feeling, birthdays don't have as much meaning for me anymore, it's just another day when you go from one age to another age. I think a lot of people hold regrets, I think the key to living a happy life is to try to not live in the past and just concentrate on the present and the future. You are only 23, so you still have your whole life ahead of you, so instead of wondering about the what ifs and what could have been, and regrets.. Concentrate on what you can do to make your remaining time a good time and what you can do to enjoy your life. We all have these feelings from time to time, it's what we decide to do with those feelings that make the difference. I hope you feel better soon ~hugs~
I'm sorry about what happened, and I can see why you feel a lot of regret. But, the past can't be changed, and the future has yet to be determined. So, stay in the present and take things one day at a time to become a better person such that you will be ready to be in a real relationship, which means getting your own life in order first. Also, happy birthday!
Thank you all for your messages, I'm feeling a lot better now and people I'm close to have been really good for me so for one, I should be thankful for them and to you guys.
Happy Birthday! Birthdays are a day to reflect. And each year there is always more and more reflection. Then the day ends and you get on with the rest of your life!
