My relationship with my best friend(male)

What with all the people sharing thoughts about being attracted to their best friends well I've decided to share a story about my former fantasy and now best friend. My very first thoughts that were gay were directed at a specific guy, he was really outgoing and fun to be around. He was skinny and tall, I pretty much started thinking about living with him and owning a house waking up and both of us being really friendly. Now, I knew he was straight but that didn't stop me from trying to get him. He had a girlfriend and I was really loving of him from afar, I watched him and admired him all day long in high school. Everything he did was impressive. He had no fear of dressing up in costumes and being seen as a weird guy. Me on the other hand I wouldn't be seen wearing costumes ever cause I was too scared of being seen in them and I hated rudimentary costumes, even costume hire is rudimentary to me. Unless I can get the exact look right, I'm not dressing up. It's almost impossible to get the exact look. But anyway back on topic okay. Well I kept on thinking about him and being sexually attracted to him because he was so damn perfect for a guy like me. I cut off ties with female friends so I could get closer to him and try and become a part of his circle. This is all the while realizing he was straight as I never saw any gay from him, he never flirted with me and he never glanced my way sexually but the thing is, if there's something I have it's determination. I was determined to get close to him. So after High School I cut off most ties with everyone in my determination to get him as a best friend so I could try and make my dream come true. I caught up with him and learnt, we had more similarities than I first realized. What we liked was similar is some cases but music he was the pop diva goddess and I was the old school Dirty South and West Coast Hip Hop white kid. He liked to dance and also rap but only to the new stuff while I hated the new stuff but I never told him this(this is what I worked out).

But anyway I got to know him quite a lot and he is now my best friend, why we hang out a lot and the football games and I try to see him more but he is going to parties and other events. I love being around him still and found that as I am around him, I get more perked up and happy. On Facebook he plays hard to get as I message him to see when we can "hang out" again.

The funny thing is that this is actually 100% true, the guy I often fantasised about is my best friend now. The sexual admiration is sort of gone but now it's replaced by like a want to get a bit intimate with him now. This is all the while knowing he is straight. That's how desperate I was for a relationship with a guy and realistically is the strongest indicator of my gay preference. I sorta repressed the feeling knowing he's straight and got a girlfriend, but it's still there it's just playing the waiting game with him.

I think this is a credit to my patience and I think It will work great when I actually meet a gay guy who I will love just as much as my straight friend. I also want something more to happen with my straight friend and I also just enjoy being in his presence and feeling his soft skin on me. It's a thing of beauty, do you guys think this is unhealthy to want to be more intimate and in a love relationship with my best friend. I'm definitely trying to suppress the feelings but they will pop at random stages and I'll wonder if I can go further.