Random Dating/Family Problems

Okay, so I kind of have a lot of issues going on with family and dating and just thought I'd try to sort through some of it.

First, the dating situation. No one's ever been interested in me, really, and suddenly I have two guys wanting to date me. One is across the country (I just moved), so I'm not too worried about it. The other is one of my new coworkers... and I have no idea what I'm doing.

First off, he doesn't know I'm trans*, so that could potentially turn bad. So I'm freaking out quite a bit (I haven't dated since I figured out that I'm trans*) and have no clue how to handle it. I know it's probably overreacting for me to have to try to convince myself that I'm not going to get murdered just for going on a date, but for some reason, that (and other things) is a huge concern.

Second, he's not of my religion. Which means that my parents freaked out when they heard that I was going on a date with him. A date. Not a marriage proposal. Not even a relationship. Just a date. Of course, it's probably not helping things that this date is on Sunday, which is technically against my religion, but still. I don't know, though. I mean, I'd like to get married in one of my church's temples someday (which requires that both the bride and groom be members of my church), if I ever get married, but I know it's not likely to happen because of the whole transgender issue. And it's been drilled into my brain since I was a kid that "you marry who you date."

Third, we technically work together. In different departments, to be fair, but the employee handbook still says that workplace romance is not allowed. Obviously if this gets anywhere, we'd be in a teensy bit of violation of that rule.

Fourth, he seems to really like me. Which is problematic. I mean, I've known the guy for a whole 36 hours and he's already asking if I'll take him with me when I go to Europe (if I ever get to go to Europe). He's asked if he could walk me to my car at the end of work. He's making ice cubes for me (which apparently he never does). And I don't know how to react to all this. It's forbidden in so many ways, and possibly dangerous in another. And he wants to text all the time. And lol, it's probably really obvious that I've never really dated much before.

Anyway, so that's the dating issues. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Now for the family part. My family is extremely conservative and hates transgender people. And gay people. (Makes it fun being me lol, even though I'm very much not out to them). I've just finally come to the conclusion that I am going to go insane and end up trying to get rid of certain body parts myself if I don't go on testosterone. So, having made that decision, now I get the awesome fun of having to figure out how this is going to work. I have a really bad feeling that I'll lose my family if I tell them. Or, for that matter, if I come home with changes from testosterone. And I mean, I know I have time to figure it out. I still haven't even seen a gender therapist. But it's hard having it in the back of my mind that my time with them is limited. The choice between my sanity and my family... not a fair choice, or an easy one, but a choice that I feel like I have to make.

Anyway, now that I've rambled on and on about nothing and nearly bored myself to sleep with this rant, I should probably let myself pass out from exhaustion. My words aren't even working anymore. Night, everyone, and thanks for any answers, comments, or suggestions that you have!