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1st gay date.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by ILetItGo, Nov 14, 2014.

  1. ILetItGo

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    So, I've got that nervous excitement going, and when I talk about it I can't stop smiling. But, then that soon passes, and I feel a tremendous amount of pressure, and immediately get bloated, which is the super sexy way my body decides to deal with stress.
    This guy is older, been out for 8 years, I've been out for 2 months, and he is driving 2 and a bit hours to see me. It's someone I matched with over a dating app when I was back at my parents. So, the fact that it is going to be first date with him, first 'blind' date, first gay date. and first date with anyone in over a year. i'm getting a bit panicky.

    I don't know what to do, I don't like eating on the first date, but he's driving a long way, I can't deny him food. He also has a free night in a hotel coincidently in the city I'm living in, which works well, but I'm also feeling a bit of pressure to be expected to go back there with him.

    Any thoguhts or advice on this would be greatly appreciated! Thanks guys! :icon_bigg
     
  2. Spartan 117

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    First off, congratulations! :slight_smile:

    Second off, you really shouldn't feel pressured to go back with him. I know I wouldn't on a first date. Take things at your own pace, and make sure you're comfortable. You have to be comfortable, even if he has driven out to see you.

    I'm sure if he's travelling all that way, you have things in common and you must like each other - so there really is no need to be nervous! Just be natural, and be yourself. Usually the most nerve wracking part is thinking about the first date, when he's actually there you'll probably feel a lot better.

    I know being told to relax isn't much help :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: but you will be okay, I hope you have a nice time!
     
  3. shinji

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    Fundamental rules of having a strong relationship. First, see if you can become friends. This automatically excludes any kinky stuff that he might want to do.

    Obviously, be extra careful, considering how you "met" this person. You need to be extra cautious with letting your guard down!
     
  4. greatwhale

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    I echo this sentiment as well. When you first meet him, make sure it is in a public place, and do only what you feel comfortable doing.

    There's a saying to keep in mind: Don't let any fool just kiss you and don't let just any kiss fool you.

    Be safe...and enjoy yourself!
     
  5. ILetItGo

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    Thanks guys, I think having my guard up won't be an issue. Despite me claiming "i let it go", I still have a lot of work to do opening myself up to this world, so I don't think I'll diving in head first with anything. We have chatted a little bit, and have mutual friends back home, but I still am reserving a bit of "this is a essentially a complete stranger who could be anybody" mentality on my mind. But, I'm optimistic that's he's just a regular guy.

    But what should I suggest we should do, I think he's getting to Cardiff around 5. So we have quite a bit of time, what are some good first date ideas?
     
  6. Spartan 117

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    There must be fun things to do in Cardiff! Coffee or a drink is always a tried and true classic. :slight_smile: Most people will agree that the cinema isn't so great for a first date, because you don't get to talk to each other - at least not without enraging the rest of the audience. Unless of course, you both really want to see the film! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  7. ILetItGo

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    Thinking of getting some drinks first, to make sure we click before committing to food. Then a walk around the christmassy streets after dinner if we do eat, to walk it off, cos as i said, im gonna be bloooooaaated with nerves+food! And see how I feel after the evening, then I'll decide what to do about the night!

    ...might need so more advice with that to, from some more seasoned daters.