I think this guy likes me...but he has a girlfriend?

--WARNING: LONG POST-- :icon_sad: sorry
So just let me start by saying , I am a closeted gay male (I'm still a bit confused but im gonna settle down with that) well I am out to a few friends. I am only keeping this to myself right now because I live in a town where hottest gossips spreads like wildfire :eusa_doh:.Pretty much everyone knows everyone.. When people ask me if Im gay , I don't deny nor confirm it; I just say 'what do you think' or 'why ? are you interested?' in a kind of a joking manner.I just feel bad denying it , I feel like I've gone back to this old in denial teenager that I was 3 years ago. So I'm keeping this to myself until I get my own life , career and last but not the least out of this town. Can't afford being kicked out by my parents just in case.

So I work in a restaurant inside a hotel , he works for the hotel. Whenever we bump into each other we seem very awkward like we don't know what to say to each other and I seem so nervous when I am around him and I can feel that he is too. We would stare at each other first and then we say hello but sometimes I have to be the one who has to look away. and the way he stares isn't like a how a straight guy would. It lingers and while his head turns to a different direction , his still staring at me. And I noticed if you are attracted or at least interested you would kind of do this (its just my observation , I could be wrong )He always offers me a lift a home but I always find an excuse because in the car it just gonna be so awkward ! so much tension , and I'm always afraid of saying the wrong thing. Although Recently, something happened where everyone is so busy including the hotel staff and I needed help moving the table we borrowed from the hotel , and I was asking my co workers to help but no one seems to notice at all , they couldn't even hear me but him. He was walking past me and he managed to pay attention to me. So he helped me , it was really awkward. I thanked him and that's when I noticed he might actually like me? we were talking ( still awkward) but he tries to avoid eye contact and so did I but he does this thing where he stares but turning his head to a different direction but this time it was shorter. That time , we were on the same area ; whenever he walks past I can notice him staring at me. Most of the time , I tell myself that I am reading into this too much though its frequent so I thought I should look into this. There was also times when I ignore him because of my conscience .. I tell myself to avoid liking/falling for people who has a partner and obviously if he doesn't swing that way , and I noticed when I came into the break room (the restaurant and the hotel share the same break room) he walked out and didn't finish his food and stored the rest his food in a take away container.he also looked mad. I felt really bad! I'm not sure if I was the reason or it was something else but I had a feeling it was because of me. So back to the time when helped me carry the table, after the night ended I finally told myself to man up , and accepted his offer to give me a lift home. I noticed when he was changing clothes in the locker room ; he was really fast haha. So the ride home was awkward , but not as bad as I thought it would be. We were talking the whole but constantly thinking what to say , the conversation didn't really glide naturally. When we got to my house , his girlfriend called .. and thanked him and said goodbye. I noticed as I walked to my house , his eyes followed me .. It was a nice feeling but had a bit of guilt because he was talking to his girlfriend so I was really confused. He is a very a masculine guy which is why I never thought he couldn't be gay. I am still unsure of his sexuality thats why I back off most of the time , and I just tell myself he is being friendly. But why am I so sure about his interest in me? It feels different , I have less doubts or not even one! before my I always crush on straight whom I thought were gay and I would look into the smallest things and in the end they were totally straight. So please help :help: I don't know what to do , :tears: since this year I noticed a lot more people are interested in me (not to be cocky , but I've always thought I was very very unattractive) and guys checking me out like ive never received such attention! which gives me a confidence boost. Sometimes I get , random facebook request and some guys are so attractive , I don't even know why they add me!I don't even know them. But to be honest , I think I may have found someone who likes me back! well my feelings are growing really fast. I finally feel less insecure with someone who I like and It would be really nice if he really likes me back. It gives me hope but at the same time he has a girlfriend which bothers me because I'm a sensitive person and If I was in her shoes (for instance) I wouldn't feel good about it, I'd feel betrayed and hurt! So please help me , how do I figure this out?

 

thats right , but being at the same place it's bit hard now to get over him . He always gives me attention! that I never had in my whole life

 

thank you! I hope I can get over him but it just sucks being stuck in this situation.oh well