I can't stop thinking about him...

Hey guys!

So I've posted several threads on several different guys. I had this weird issue where I would feel unsure about my feelings toward a guy, and then I would just end whatever we had and move on. The issue was that I hadn't addressed was my first relationship which had never really been focused on. I've moved on from that now.

So, here I am, talking to several guys from my area (online) just casually. This one guy asked me to hangout, and he seemed like a nice guy and he was gorgeous. We were just hanging out, wasn't a date or anything. We went to the mall, had dinner at a burger joint (how cute) and had coffee. I have never been so amazed by a person's personality. He honestly seems like the most wonderful person I've ever met. He seems like he has such a big heart and having his company is so great. We hung out/met yesterday, and since then he has been stuck on my mind. I was busy at work today but he was still racing through my mind. The upsetting thing about it is, I don't think or know if the feelings are mutual. In most situations like this, I would just say "F*** it, plenty of fish" but I doubt I'll ever meet someone who captures my mind and attention like him. I've never met anyone who inspired me to be a better person, yet one wonderful evening with this gentleman and I felt so inspired. Inspired to treat others well, inspired to think optimistically. He didn't even say things like that, I just observed the way he interacted with others. Incredible. As a person going through depression, coming home from that night and being able to enter my house happily, and feel excitement when I saw that my parents picked out a Christmas tree. I had never been so happy about a Christmas tree. It's crazy. I don't know what to do. We didn't kiss or anything and I think it's good, no need to rush anything. I just don't think it will progress because he doesn't seem as interested.

 

Jumping between relationships... I've only had 1 relationship, and I've just talked to guys other than that. My issues before were that I was unsure about feeling anything because I just wasn't "clicking" with those guys.

Now, my issue is that things DID click and I can't stop thinking about him. And about if he'll ever be interested in me and ugh I overthink way too much and I can't help it.

 

Oh my gosh we spoke on the phone 10 minutes ago, he's so intriguing. I have never felt so happy from simply talking to somebody. He's incredible.

 

So... Update...

We hung out today, and apparently I may have been wrong about the whole him not being interested thing. I say that simply because we kissed, and he does sweet things and makes sweet gestures towards me. I'm very interested in him, I've never felt this sure about my feelings for another person before. Not even my ex. This guy is a complete knockout, I've never met anyone so incredible. I know I shouldn't "put him on a pedestal" but I have yet to discover a flaw.

I'm scared though. The last time I did have true feelings for someone was when I had a boyfriend, and that ended in pain. I think I would be quite hurt if things with this guy didn't work. He's so incredible. He's a beautiful human being in general I have no way to describe how perfect he is I could almost cry tears of joy talking about it. This is so strange. I'm scared.

 

I'm confused with the whole situation because I can't tell if we're just taking it slow or if I'm being taken advantage of for sexual favors but I'm putting trust in this guy because he seems amazing and he doesn't seem to be solely interested in sexual favors, I don't know. That's another reason I'm scared. But I'm down to hookup, I just really like this guy. He's great, and I want him to be a part of my life.

 

I'm afraid of things not working out. He's one of a kind and as afraid I am of getting into a relationship and things not working out, I'm more afraid that things won't even get that far. I'm gonna see him again in a few days. I can't wait.

---------- Post added 27th Dec 2014 at 12:26 AM ----------

he is such a beautiful person I can't get over it.

---------- Post added 27th Dec 2014 at 12:26 AM ----------

He seriously is indescribable, whoever ends up marrying him is going to be so frickin lucky.

 

that's my issue. I think I might be scaring him away but I also don't want to seem as if I don't care. I'm having trouble with that part.

 

Update: We opened the New Year together, I'm crushing so hard, he's a beautiful person. I tend to rush into things, but a good friend of his told me that if he felt rushed he would probably run far away and just distance himself from me because he likes taking things slowly before committing I guess. So I'm trying hard to know my limits, I'd make it official now honestly but if he isn't ready for that I'm 100% okay with that. I just have to be careful, I don't want to mess things up. He makes me happy and makes me want to be a better person and he's just overall really good to me. Just have to watch myself with rushing things I guess.

 

Yeah I think my biggest issue is overthinking & panicking over nothing. I'll just let things progress themselves each time we see each other and try living in those moments rather than focusing on the future.