The Stressful balance of school work and love life

You know what the issues are. They are in your own post.

You want it both ways. To get good academic results AND piss around with your mates who are a distraction and who couldn't give a toss about the quality of your studies

What you need is to "get unstuck" and do something about these issues.

Coursework. Think of the bigger picture. Why you are doing this - presumably to lay foundations for a great university and onward career. "I do have dreams of a high end career" to quote you. just focus on that idea alone and whether dropping a subject is wise. Or necessary. Can you fast forward 10 years and then the future you looks back and says "DarkMatter - get excited about these subjects they are really cool and necessary for the job I want" and somehow re-engage with them. I put this matter first above the weed and the friends as it is really a big issue. If the subjects are too much, or unnecessary for your future goals then that is another matter.

Weed. Watch out. It may be fun but it is distracting you from he coursework and it can have negative psychological effects further down the line in later life (anxiety, depression, psychosis, depersonalisation) I have seen this too many times. Moderation if nothing else.

The relationships. If you are hanging around people who are less interested in their studies, it will undermine your own goals. In fact you acknowledge this yourself. So I go back to the "coursework" comments above. Decide what is more important to you.

"I cannot set boundaries due to lack of determination and will power." well, maybe now it is time to wake up and make some changes for 2015 ???

 

This sounds a lot like me in my last 2 years of high school, minus the weed and crazy friends though. I had similar grades and was a perfectionist etc. etc. but struggling with my feelings for my best friend... also with really good grades and a perfectionist...

Well.. my way of dealing with that was to take a gap year on exchange to Costa Rica. But since that doesn't seem like an option here, I'll try to give you some advice.

Ok, so this friend you like a lot, he knows your gay? Have you considered telling him about how you feel?

Also, have you considered talking to your friends about how you're struggling with your courses and feeling a bit lost? They might be able to offer you some support.

Do you have any idea what kind of career you're thinking of pursuing? (This is still a problem for me, I still have no idea...)
If you do know, let that be a guide for you about what courses you want to do. Just make sure you enjoy what you're doing. It's not worth stressing yourself out to do something that doesn't make you happy.

I hope this helps

 

I went through something similar in my last couple years of high school, particularly the bit about friends and weed.
Like you, I managed to do pretty well with my IGCSE subjects. Things got a bit shaky after the weed phase kicked in, I used to wag at least a couple periods every day on average to go get high with my friends. I think it's important for you to realise that where you're at in life right now, achieving adequate grades for the career you want later on should take precedence over getting high with your friends and neglecting your studies. I would suggest you let them know that you're struggling with school work and perhaps they'll encourage and motivate you to buckle down and pick up the slack. Peer pressure can be overwhelming, but if these guys really care about you they'll understand.

Just as an anecdote to back up my opinion, of the people I hung out with in high school one was like you - he topped our school in everything, had like a 99.6% average across all his IGCSE subjects. the following year his grades plummeted to Bs. Once he realised he had to prioritise his school work over playing truant and getting blazed everyday it was too late. He ended up coming back for another half year to get those A*s he wanted. Me and him were the only ones in our group that actually climbed out of the hole we all fell into :/.

It's really all about balance, but when the see-saw starts tilting to the wrong side you're gonna have to re-evaluate what's really important. Good luck, I hope you're able to solve this conundrum before it's too late!

P.S Regarding the thing about you not enjoying/excelling at physics I would argue the alternative to what's already been suggested- I think it's a good idea to keep your options open, especially if you don't really know what it is you want to study at university. In fact even if you do think you know what you want to study but aren't 100% sure on it, you don't want to drop a subject impulsively because you think you won't need it for the course you intend to study at university. It might be a good idea to check out potential courses and their pre-requisites, as well as consulting with your school careers counsellor and getting their advice.

Good luck