My Str8 friend... or not so straight? Help! (another one of those posts...sorry)

Apologies as this is lengthy... So here goes..

I started speaking to this guy 10 months ago.
Ive always walked past him on his job.. and thought he was beautiful.. and the fact he looked out at me everytime.... i thought he may even like me too.
gave me mega gay vibes before we even became friends.

So one day, i went into his store for some help. we got to talkin, he was really friendly, he always looked at me with his head titled,and constant lip licking. seemed like a look of 'adoration'. he went on to tell me he hates his job, and i said id keep a lookout for other jobs for him, so we exchanged numbers.

Ever since then, we have been texting generally every single day, all day. literally 24-7. there has been 2 or three occasions where we have gone a couple days without contact and that is literally it. 10 months of continuous txt conversation

We have become very close friends, we go shopping together, eat out, and we generally go to the movies once a week, just the two of us.
Now from the start, this guy has been super touchy feely, he sends video messages rather than texts, at first i thought maybe its just his thing. but the videos range from constant shirtless videos, videos with his boxers down (usually in the bathroom- no nudity) just shows his boxers are around his ankles, videos laying in bed, randomly talking, and making alot of gay jokes.

He teases me about having an imaginary boyfriend... at this point i had never told him i was gay, but i made sure to never suggest i was straight. where as he never mentioned being straight either, infact he justifies all his female friends to me, explaining he isnt with her.... doesnt like her... she annoys him. He doesnt ask girls out or approach them, they end up approaching him, and they offer their number, he rejects and instead gives them his,explaining he wont call..so they should call him and when they do he just wont ever return their calls.

this guy may i add is beautiful, he can get any girl he wants, he gets so much attention.
but doesnt give females the same attention. i see him look at girls ocassionally, but i see him look at guys way more! he relates everything to something gay and sexual .

before i came out to him, he would every now and again say something like "i just love ladies"... but his actions dont corroborate that.
he has come off of all social media outlets as he claims girls harrass him too much.
now somebody who loves ladies, would soak up all the attention. but intead he ignores and is irresponsive to females. he hides from them when we go out. its just so confusing.
He seems to have a lot of Ex girlfriends. but hasnt been in a relationship since ive met him. as ive mentioned, he is very attractive, works out 3-4 times a week, has alot of tattoos, and even has a facial piercing. not that -that means anything

he spends alot of time with and talking to me.. now i think im a pretty obvious gay. but earlier i never mentioned it. as i thought it was obvious and i did think we were connecting in that way, without it being explicitly stated. it feels like we've been dating.

but he still implies he is into girls.
he

Now around 3 weeks ago, i told him i was gay.. he explained he worked that out months ago, but played dumb because he wanted me to tell him.. he then asked why i didnt just tell him.. i said..because im very attracted to him..so it wasn't easy. his response was "oh, im oblivious to these things"
and nothing futher verbally was said on the topic of my interest in him.
where as before my confession he use to always say , he knows im really inlove with him, and that i want to sleep with him, he knows i want his penis, he knows i'll get a boner if i ever gave him a massage. all with a smile on his face. and i just never knew how to respond as it was all true.

But since confessiong, we've started seeing eachother alot more, and he has become 10times more touchy feely! , he says alot of sexual things, makes reference to me liking guys all the time in jest, he takes things from me and challenges me to get them back from him,like in the movies the other night, we watched an adventure movie, and im sure he had an erection, i saw his pants bulge, i saw him pressing down trying to hide it, then i saw the outline when we stood up to leave. nothing sexual was in the movie, it was just me and him playing and being touchy feely as usual,like he pinches my nipples,he plays with my hair, i rub his pecs, he rubs mine, its all so confusing.

like we'll talk about porn, i explained, females do nothing for me, so he sent me loads of naked female photos the other day as i joke,so i did the same and sent him loads of naked guys. he just replied with a "sick face" emoticon and we continued our conversation.

however i recently told him, ive taken some nude photos. now everytime he sees me with my phone in my hand he asks "where them nudes at?, i wanna see?, im gonna steal your phone and look at your sexy photos" he has mentioned them every single day since i told him about them. and this has been 3 weeks now.
he relates anything nonrelated back to my "sexy nude photos"


i just find it weird that a straight guy would spend so much alone time with his gay friend, who has admitted he likes him, and the touchy feely thing getting more intense since my confession. i honestly thought he was gay from the get go, most people ask me if he is.
theres kind of nothing more i can do though, ive told him i like him. he explained to me theres a part of him he doesnt reveal to people, and that nobody knows the "real him", and i cant help but think that he is hiding the fact he is gay or bi. i mean he says things may sometimes happen with girls, but only because they have come on to him.. so many anti-female justifications. and eyes wondering at guys. that along with everything else ive said.
i just can imagine that he is fully straight and surprise surprise i have actually fallen inlove with him..we have an amazing connection.

any thoughts?

 

:eusa_doh: i'll admit , i read it back and think its obvious. and im an idiot:bang:
but in reality, its so hard to deal.:icon_redf

its just the fact that he wont make a move, and ive already poured my heart out. the ball is sort of in his court. and then today in a conversation about why im not into girls.. i explained the look of a "vagina" is off putting...and he replied "vagina's look and taste delicious" just throws me off.:rolle: he may well be bi though.:eusa_doh:

---------- Post added 21st Dec 2014 at 12:09 AM ----------

very true! thanks for your response. x

 

you are right, thing is, he has never said he is straight, but he sends me photos of naked girls to freak me out... and responds with "sick face smilies" when i send him naked guys. he seems to talk the "i love female" talk, but never really walks the walk.

i have a feeling if i ask him outright, he wont be honest with me. as he knows how i am, and still "implies" he isnt attracted to me. either way, a conversation needs to be had, so you are right!

 

this is what i fear. waiting game maybe.

 

Still in this wrut... I've recently told this guy I'm jealous of a girlfriend of his... And he explained... He has slept with her... A year ago.. And I have nothing to worry about, it didn't mean anything and it was a long time ago. Now the fact he's reassuring me.. Is nice. But is he just being polite? I'm so confused . Love him so much. Crazy that he won't just come out to me. I know within me heart that he likes me back.

---------- Post added 7th Mar 2015 at 12:15 AM ----------

By girl friend.. I mean just a female friend ! He hasn't had an actual girlfriend since we started speaking.

 

I know right, throughout the whole period we've been speaking, it's been non-stop reassurance about girls being 'just friends'... He'll start telling me a story about a girl.. And I will be wondering where he's going with it all, and it ends up with him saying but he wasn't interested, or people called him gay coz he ignored her or nothing happened and he wasn't into it. It's given me the impression that we are in some kind of unofficial relationship.

A few more points..
* so We had the jealousy convo the over night at around 10.30 PM... Following this. We sat in my car untill 1.30AM with him sitting and showing me loads of shirtless photos and selfies of himself ... Torture !

*He also worked into the convo quiet randomly the fact his dick is circumcised.

*he was at my house the other day.. We was using my laptop to do some work and he kept typing 'sex' into the keyboard... He also entered "my name+nudes" into the search bar.. He further went on to explain he doesn't see why job applications need to know a sexual orientation.. He thinks it's wrong.

*before I came out to him, he made a reference that having a gay child would be hard, as they would go through a lot, and you would have to convince them that they were born gay, it wasn't their fault, then there's coming out to the family , he said it would be easier if the child was straight... Which made me wonder if he can relate to it all. As he tends to avoid family functions etc.

*I've also discovered he has told all his friends that I'm gay, claiming they all asked, so he gave them an honest answer. Saying my it doesn't matter and I should be proud . But I can't help but think he's living vicariously through me , as he doesn't seem to be practicing what he's preaching.

*we went to a grocery store after our gym session .. And I used a divider at the checkout and he said "we're together, what's the point using one of those , are you drawing a line between gay and straight"? And laughed, but I wasn't amused offcourse as he referred to himself as straight which I'm sure he is far from...

I would bet my head that he's interested in me. I'm that sure. Just unsure how to tackle .

 

Thanks for your response x

 

Hey guys.. Thanks for the responses.

But just incase you missed it. I have already told him I have feelings for him. And he said 'oh really, I'm oblivious to these things' ...
And nothing else verbally happened. But we started spending more and more time together and he got way more touchy feely, kept telling me to tell him that he's 'amazing'. Just got extra flirty. He has also said nobody really 'knows him' how he has a part of him he hides from everybody.. And nobody knows the real him. I'm just not sure if he's ready to open up to me. But I guess , without trying , I will never know. I need to ask how he feels back .

 

True! Deffo won't pressure him