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Experimenting

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by shadowman4495, Dec 22, 2014.

  1. shadowman4495

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    Hey all,

    So recently my roommate and friend came out as gay, and so am I. He knows I'm gay and we talk a lot about it all the time. Usually when we're alone and watching Netflix or something. Well recently he has been talking with this other gay guy and that guy stayed the night and they pretty much did some sexual stuff. I asked him if they were dating and he said he did not feel ready to date him yet because he has only seen him about 3 times in real life. I then asked him if he was more comfortable with his sexuality and he said yeah after what happened last night (they sucked eachother).

    5-10 minutes later he asked me when I was going to be ready to date guys. I told him I wasn't sure as I have not came out to my parents yet. He also stated that doing those sexual acts made him realize who he was and what he wanted. I feel like he was trying to hint at us doing stuff together. Basically like 20 minutes later (before going to bed), I asked him if I could ask him a personal question. I really wanted to ask him if he wanted to experiment a bit. I just could not push myself to ask him and eventually told him that I'm just going to go to bed. I really like him and I feel like I'm falling for him more everyday. He is really nice to me and we are really close to eachother. I just want to try him out.

    Should I bring up the question again and just man it out and ask him how he feels about experimenting? I just don't want to end a really good friendship or make it awkward between eachother. He stated that guy was going to come over again and he always mentions his name in conversations. I don't know if I have a chance to try anything with him as he might be pursuing another guy right now.


    I'm just really confused on what to do and i honestly regret not asking him last night. Should I try anything or just give up and move on?

    Thanks for reading this! We are both guys. I'm 19 he is 20
     
  2. OnTheHighway

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    No harm in being open and honest. You are each having the discussion and are already being quite open with one another.
     
  3. Chip

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    I think if you were to just ask, even in an offhand way, if maybe he'd like to try experimenting with you... The worst that would happen is he'd say he isn't comfortable or doesn't like you that way or something. It might be awkward for 15 minutes but not beyond that.

    Do keep in mind that if you start dating or being sexual with him and it doesn't work out, you might have to switch rooms. If you are at a college usually that isn't a big deal.
     
  4. shadowman4495

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    Thanks for the advice . What do you guys recommend saying? Maybe just ask straight up or word it in a way in which it won't be so straight up?
     
  5. WhiteShadows

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    Just say what you were going to say:

    "Can I ask you a personal question?" "Did you want to... experiment a bit?"

    Worst thing that happens is he says no and you both get over it.
     
  6. robclem21

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    Good advice already. Just come out with it. "How do you feel about maybe experimenting with me?" or "would you consider experimenting with me?"

    Seems the best route to me...
     
  7. Erick

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    It's natural to experiment, I honestly see no harm in doing so.