So, my boyfriend and I have been together over a month. We seem to be pretty stable. However, there are some problems I have with myself and with him. First of all, it's like he's totally happy and fine with being secret. This is a problem for me as I plan on coming out soon and telling my parents about him (which should only make it better for both of us). He's fine with me telling my parents but has no intention of telling his parents or any of his friends. However, I think about our future, and how people are already preparing for prom. I told him I really want to go to prom with him and he said "Well my parents would wonder why I'm going with a guy?" Yeah they would, but not if you tell them? And I don't want to push him, that is the last thing I want to do, as he has a cousin who just came out and his cousin's parents weren't too happy. But how can we do this forever? It's not healthy for our relationship. He always wants me to come meet his friends but then I can't kiss him! The whole time I'm with him and his friends! And we can kiss in front of my friends. I just feel really selfish. Oh, another thing is we live in different towns, only 10 mins away but different school districts. However, the problem with this is that I work at a summer camp in his town and know people he goes to school with, which is why even if I come out before him we must keep it a secret because we have mutual friends! Am I being selfish? How do I deal with our relationship?
I think if he's not ready to come out yet, you have to respect that. He could have homophobic parents or friends, and that must be hell to deal with. Tell him that because he really means a lot to you, you really want to go to the prom with him, but that if he can't go because he's not ready to come out yet, then it's ok. If he can't go with you, just go with a friend. Maybe someone who you're out to and can be a "beard" for you. There are other meaningful things you can do with your boyfriend asides from going to the prom. Good luck
