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I really like her. How should I tell her?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by flee4517, Dec 29, 2014.

  1. flee4517

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    She's a very old fashioned type of woman (as am I). She knows I like her cause I told her months ago. We flirt constantly & play wrestle. She's always wanting to know whats going on in my life & asking me personal questions about sex, kissing, etc. She invited me to spend Christmas with her family which I gladly accepted. When we hug she initiates it & she hugs me so tight & sort of squeezes and rubs my lower back. She's always telling me how beautiful I am and that I look great. We eat lunch everyday together.

    But now she's planning to move to Colorado to get a fresh start. I'm afraid if I don't completely confess how much I care about her now then I'll regret it.

    Should I text her how I'm feeling, write her a letter or tell her face to face?
     
    #1 flee4517, Dec 29, 2014
    Last edited: Dec 29, 2014
  2. STM29

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    Sounds like she really likes you (at least as a good friend). I think you should talk to her face to face and be honest about your feelings. If you don't tell her how you feel there will be always the "what if..." in your head.
     
  3. Really

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    I would do it during one of those hugs.
    For me, it would be easier not having to look her in the eye right away. After I said it, then I would look.
     
  4. flee4517

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    Well there's a lot I want to tell her. She already knows I like her but I want to tell her exactly how I feel about her
     
  5. I think you should write her a letter if you have a lot to say..writing a girl letter like that is romantic...I would write her a letter if I were you.
     
  6. flee4517

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    That's what I was leaning towards. But I was worried she would think it's a pathetic approach or wonder why I couldn't tell it to her face. What do you think?
     
  7. mbanema

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    Definitely tell her -- I can almost guarantee you'll regret it if you don't take that chance, even if it's a long shot.

    I don't think texting is the best idea. I think a lot of people will recommend telling her in person, but I suggest writing a letter. This can be a pretty emotional thing and writing allows you to say exactly what you want whereas in person it's much easier to get flustered. It might also be a lot for her to take in and a letter will give her more time to process that and give you a thoughtful response.

    Either way, good luck! :slight_smile:
     
  8. flee4517

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    Well that's what I was thinking. That it wouldn't be putting her on the spot to give me an answer right then and there. I was thinking about writing one that's about 1-2 pages. Does that sound OK? Even with a letter I'm so nervous. Because there's times when she acts really into me & then times when it seems like I don't really matter to her. Like today for example. She sent me a text around 11:30 am asking me how I was & how work was going (we work together). I told her I was good & that work was fine, etc. I asked her how she was and she said she was good and on her way to court (moral support for a friend). I told her I was glad she was ok & to let me know how it goes & she said OK. A few hrs later I got off & asked her if they were out yet & she said "just now battery is almost dead" I told her to be careful going home & thanked her for advice she gave me yesterday. That was about 5 hrs ago & she hasn't written me back. So see, I stay confused about how she might feel about me...
     
    #8 flee4517, Dec 29, 2014
    Last edited: Dec 29, 2014
  9. mbanema

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    I know it's really, really hard not to read into things like not getting quick responses to messages, but there's almost always an explanation other than her not caring what you say or not wanting to talk to you. It sounds like you're pretty close and have known each other for quite some time -- don't let that be overshadowed by something trivial.

    As for your letter, I'm probably not the best person to ask as I can be pretty verbose with that kind of thing. Say what you need to say and don't worry about the length. Whether she returns your feelings or not, I doubt she'll be too concerned about having to take a few minutes to read something from somebody who cares about her.
     
  10. flee4517

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    Thank you so much!!! I'm gonna dig deep for the courage to give her a letter this week. I'm praying things work out
     
  11. all paths

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