I like one of my friends. Crush may be a slight misnomer; at one point my feelings were headed that way, but I think the fact that he's straight has tempered them. He does know I like him and he's amazing about it. Nothing has changed, which I'm very grateful for. In any case, I of course like hanging out with him. A few weeks ago he and some other friends came over to my place and the two of us ended up sitting on the couch, my shoulder on his and his leg resting against mine. He even briefly put his head on my shoulder. It was so lovely! The whole evening was great, but that's the part I remember most clearly But then I often find myself ambivalent when an opportunity to hang out with him arises. Maybe the fact that we can't be anything more than friends makes it harder to be around him? It feels sort of weird that I so enjoy being with him but sometimes don't want to. Anyone else have experiences like this?
Story of my life. All my crushes and love interests are straight. And they don't have a clue. But the feelings makes me a live I wouldn't trade them with anything. You know the rush you get when you see them the urges you get when you are near them. I don't know. Even if its one way relation. I prefer it to no feelings at all.
