I realised that just because someone is related to you doesn't mean the are magically your ally, just as you have to meet people and learn if they are you friend or foe you should do the same with family My dad is a very bitter, sad man and will be regardless of how much money he makes or success or whatever material things he has, he complains grumbles about trivial stuff, he doesn't criticse constructively, gossips like a teenage girl,takes things offensively when they are not, and he can't even tell when you are annoyed by him. My parents had a bad breakup lots of fighting verbally and physically, loud screaming with people on the street staring at the house, people on the road staring while they fight in car while driving,nieghbours calling cops etc, he threatened her alot, my mom died of illness later and he even sometimes implies she looked for it, he has a new girl now. He has this kinda mid life crisis thing where he goes out to parties catering to people in late teens and twenties, he even shows a very childish six year old type of kind of bipolar state every now and then. He says that no gay men are or will ever be happy, how gays are empty inside, and if i'm gay i'll be sad and empty and depressed and lonely forever and age alone, but look at him he's a prime example of sadness I'm just waiting till i finish college and get a job to cut ties ASAP, just as a parents can disown and kick out a rebellious kid or unwanted gay kid, I can disown my dad. He better start planning his retirement from now, and his own funeral years in advance because i won't be there.
I'm a gay man and while life isn't perfect, I've had plenty of great things happen as well and I'm pretty darn happy I also know/have known a fair number of other gay men in pretty much the same situation. Yes, life can throw unpleasant things at you, but it can do that to everybody without regard to orientation. My dad was an emotionally abusive ass whose list of unpleasant and literally criminal activities would fill paragraphs. He once took a good half hour out of a very nice day to tell me in gleeful detail how worthless I was and how worthless I would always be (with a happy little grin on his face the whole time). He died alone and I have not even a sliver of regret about that. They say living well is the best revenge - so live well and prosper. Todd
