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My Boyfriend Never Texts Me First? Etc...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by 0Marionette0, Jan 3, 2015.

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  1. 0Marionette0

    0Marionette0
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    Okay so, I'm 15 and my boyfriend is 16 and we've been dating for a little while now. But I've noticed something that makes me nervous. He never texts me first. Also, I never hear a word from him unless I'm the one who messages him first. It just seems like I'm the only one trying to communicate...the only one trying in the relationship. And it makes me nervous, because he's also never the first to say he loves me. I always have to say it first which makes me wonder about whether he really does love me, or if he's putting on an act?
    I've also noticed he doesn't really like to talk about us. He always changes the subject to his friend because she has some mental health issues that he's worried about. I totally understand why he's worried about her, but I also have a lot of issues that he knows about, like depression, anxiety, etc...and he doesn't seem to worry about me at all. He even knows I've been really suicidal lately but he doesn't really seem to care. It just seems like he tries to hurt me. Like he always talks about how he's cuddling up to her and how he lets her sleep with him all the time or how he loves to cuddle with her and kiss her and stuff...I get that it might be selfish of me to be so jealous. But who wouldn't be? I just get the feeling he doesn't love me nearly as much as I love him...

    So here are my questions.

    -Is this something to be concerned about? Am I overreacting?

    -Is it normal to be jealous about this sort of thing?

    -If he is losing interest, how can I gain it back?

    -Do you think he's losing interest?

    Thanks for listening. I hope to see some answers. I've been really anxious...
     
    #1 0Marionette0, Jan 3, 2015
  2. 0Marionette0

    0Marionette0
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    Thanks for the advice guys. I appreciate it.:dry:
     
    #2 0Marionette0, Jan 4, 2015
  3. DanJames

    DanJames
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    I'm sorry nobody's replied.

    My best advice to you would be to not think about it, the more you obsess over it the more likely he would be to push you away.

    Play it cool, if you make yourself too available and he's not showing interest then 9 times out of 10 it will only get worse.
     
    #3 DanJames, Jan 4, 2015
  4. mangotree

    mangotree
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    How long have you been together exactly?

    It sounds like you're really craving his communication and his company.
    Consider the possibility that his aloofness is causing you to want him more than normal.
     
    #4 mangotree, Jan 4, 2015
  5. Chromedome

    Chromedome
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    Maybe you should slow down, your frequent communication may be so common that he doesn't feel the need to contact you first because he expects you to do it.

    This can turn out bad where he may end up seeing you as clingy or positive in a way where you can perform an experiment:
    if you don't text him first for like a week or two and he never texts you first during that time, it means you are putting more effort into the relationship than he is and he needs to step up his game to keep you.
     
    #5 Chromedome, Jan 4, 2015
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