I keep in touch with some old friends via online chat programs. Friends that I have made while playing online games. We usually chat on a daily basis, but as of late they seem to have lost interest. I decided to deprive them of my presence and not write anything for a day or two, thinking that they will start missing me and reach out. This has not happened, and I am starting to worry that maybe they no longer consider me their friend. Obviously it is far too early to make judgements on this, but the fact remains that it does worry me. We have not played together in quite a while, so that might also be a contributing factor. I am curious to know, if anyone else has had a similar falling out with friends, where they just stop writing and the friendship falls apart as a result?
It has happened to me before. I used to write letters to a friend who moved to another state, and he eventually stopped writing back and we stopped being friends. I could have stayed in touch other ways, but I learned that he got into drugs and alcohol and I didn't want to be friends with him anymore after that. Sometimes people just grow apart. It's hard to maintain relationships when you don't ever see eachother in person. Then there are the people that just won't let it go when you grow apart... I have a friend who I feel like he basically used me for free food and a place to hangout and watch movies when he didn't want to be at his house. He liked to invite himself over and gorge on all our food. We never had anything in common in the first place. I've realized this and I tried to stop talking to him, but he will not leave me alone. He texts me relentlessly and gets angry when I don't reply.
Sometimes you just don't have enough to say to chat daily. And, some people are just not so good at staying in touch remotely (I'm one of that group myself). I wouldn't take it personally.
Yes, I have an entire group of friends like that. It's not uncommon at all. Don't take it personally. Think of it like this.. We're all on different paths, sometimes our paths overlap with others. Eventually the paths can part and join with others. It's not a conscious choice, it just happens. If you're concerned and would like to stay in contact with them, consider sending them a message inviting them to catch up.
Life. It happens. And it's not always fun. Especially when we end up drifting apart from people that we were once so close to. I have been there and am seemingly still there in some cases. I know I have personally undergone so many different changes in the past year of my life, all of it utterly unexpected. Sometimes it's hard to keep in touch, or stay relevant, with the friends I had due to them experiencing their own lifestyle changes. Sometimes its just a matter of losing the glue that held you together. [A guild you were both in falls apart/ your dating characters break up/ the site you played on together closed] Then at times it seems like there is really nothing at all to blame. But the only way for you to really know whats going on is to reach out and level with everyone. You'd be surprised to find that sometimes the feeling is mutual and each party is just thinking...'whats going on here?' I'm not saying it'll always end up with a happy reunion, but at least reaching out would let everyone know where they stand. And it can be hard to let go of a friendship that once meant so much to you. I'm that person. I don't really push the topic though, because I know its just that our lives both went in different directions. All you an do is accept things like that and be happy you were given such a friendship to cherish in the first place. And know that more will surely come.
Thank you all for the feedback, it is indeed reassuring to know that this has happened to others as well. I will try to get in touch and see what the reason for this is, after a few hours, if I do not fall asleep. Time zones can be really problematic when friends live hours apart. I am guessing they have problems to deal with, seems like the most plausible explanation.
Could it be because your gaming buddies moved to other games? Unfortunately gaming buddies tend to be short lived if you don't play the same game anymore. Game Buddy thing is typical hetero male companionship... you do same thing, conversations barely get skin deep and usually focused on thing you do instead of how you feel... tho my experience based on hetero guys... so keep that in mind. We usually play as static groups so it eas easier to screen playing habits/conversations to decide what everyone up to.
This has happened to me quite a bit. Most are because I've had some major moves e.g. moving to a different country and others are just due to general life moving on. It doesn't get to me as much as it used to especially since the people who mean the most to me are still in fact in my life. I guess I've just adopted the attitude that things happen for a reason and that I shouldn't cry over spilt milk.
