Why do i do this to myself? Everytime I do it it only upsets me. Just now I went into a discussion forum on another website and they were talking about the first time they ever sucked a penis. This is something I have never done nor have ever had done to me. The problem is, I am not the sort of person to go and do this sort of thing with just anyone...I need to know them, build a relationship with them of some sort and then I would feel comfortable doing this sort of thing...only trouble is, no one I like ever likes me back...the only guys who ever show me any interest are ones I have no interest in whatsoever...and at my age of mid- forties I am scared that I will never get to experience this. I made myself more upset when I looked down my Facebook Friends listed as being 'online' at that moment and every single one of them has had the opportunity to have or give and or recieve oral sex with someone they liked that liked them in return.......except for me. What is wrong with me? Why does it happen for everyone else...and I mean EVERYONE else in my life, except for me? There really must be something so incredibly wrong with me but all my friends and family are too kind to tell me what it is
There is nothing wrong with you. You could think about what kind of partner you would like to have... and you could really think about what is "wrong" with the people you attract... what do they stand for ? Why don't you like it ? Conscious and subconscious intentions and expectations attract very much... you could give this some thought... if you have a clearer image of a partner - not an exact picture, just a core idea what you would like to have - you might have it easier. Then you could try to enjoy yourself, and get out and try to meet people... in a bar, or wherever... you might have a look here, just for ideas... : http://emptyclosets.com/forum/anonymous-discussions/149346-where-can-i-meet-lgbtq-people.html#4 meeting people, see what you have in common, and take it from there... (*hug*)
Is oral sex that important to you? I don't wanna judge, since all I know about you is this short post, but you seem pretty obsessed with it. Try to just meet a guy you like. Don't think about sex at all, just meet him because he is a good person that you get on with well, and you will see, it will come naturally if you two click
