Okay, I haven't posted here with a problem recently, but I've been feeling extremely guilty about something recently. So last year, I guess about a year ago now, I came out to one of my best friends (she was a girl). She was super accepting and we texted constantly ever since...she was probably my best friend last year. I felt like I could be myself around her. But then over the Summer our communication got less and less because she was really busy over the summer, but we still chatted every now and then. Since the beginning of the school year however, I've been...I don't know, giving her the cold shoulder? The fact of the matter is, she makes me feel vulnerable, because she knows more about me than anyone else. Part of me liked that, but part of me now doesn't. I tried to blame it on that I didn't like her relationship with her boyfriend, who I am also out to, but I'm beginning to think it's not that. No matter the confusing reason I did it, I attempted to try and cut her out of my life. It started off in subtle ways. We've stopped texting, for one. But lately I've just been completely ignoring her and sometimes avoiding her and talking to other people. So recently at school, there was some sort of concert that was mandatory for people of the band to be there. This was Thursday. So I was there with one of my other friends, and she was there too. And she looked SO down. Literally, she was mumbling her words, texting her boyfriend, looked like she was about to cry at one point. At that moment, Jesus, did I feel horrible. I don't think she was upset at me then, I have a guess (her boyfriend goes through depression issues every now and then, history of cutting, so I guess he was going through that again), but I still felt really bad that I hadn't been there for her when she was this upset in the past. What if she was going through something?? I wanted to help her. I offered a hug, and she accepted. At that moment, I knew I wanted my friend back. So, I am considering texting her and asking what was wrong...although I am worried that maybe the damage is already done? Can our friendship be repaired? It never officially ended or anything, nothing was said, it was just me treating her badly. Do you think I should try taking it slowly with her, maybe slowly mend the bridges and build back that trust? I don't know how to approach this. I'm shit with emotions. Anyway, thanks if you find this topic good enough to read to the end to...
I think you should apologize and tell her that you value her and hope that she can forgive you. Good luck!
I would suggest an apology and then immediately try and help her with her problem, or at least listen to what she has to say. Pulling focus to your own relationship with her might not be too good as that can add to the stress she already is feeling. When the issue is resolved you can give her a proper apology and an explanation about how you are feeling. For now, just do not think about it too much and just try to be there for her.
