Confessing

So. Humans. Social interactions. Feelings. Talking and being open about my feelings with other humans. All things I am bad at. I think I've talked about all or most of that in other threads. But I feel like I need to tell someone that I have feelings for her, even though I am very sure she doesn't feel the same. That makes this even harder, in a way. Because, why put myself through that stress and anxiety when there's no hope of anything happening? But I've held back my feelings before in a sort of similar situation, and I still wonder what might have happened if I said something, and I'm trying harder not to let fear or uncertainty hold me back or make me wonder anymore. It's just I'm finding it difficult to find the nerve, and the right words.

And it seems like this is something that should be done in person, but since I'm having trouble finding the words without that added pressure I'm not sure I can. Even if I plan it out beforehand, I have a way of jumbling my words when I'm anxious, if I'm able to remember them at all. Should I just deal with the jumbling and fumbling? Would it be lame to confess in writing? A handwritten letter might be more personal than a text or something, I suppose. And maybe a little less lame? I don't have an address to send it to, but I could give it to her before she leaves next time I see her. Is that a good idea? Is any of this a good idea? Considering she hasn't really given me the time of day for the past week or so, I'm not sure. I can't stop feeling this way though. :help:

 

Yeah, I think that's what I'm leaning toward. Since sleep wasnt really a thing that was happening last night I already wrote it. So if I can't say it in person, at least I'll have that as a backup option.