Ok three weeks ago I moved back home to my parents because my boyfriend died and other reasons. Well every weekend my mom keeps bothering me about church and that I should be going to church. Me and my boyfriend never believed in organized religion and see no benefit in it. I left the catholic church a long time ago. I believe in God, read the bible, and apparently that's not good enough for my mother. She known my feelings for a year or two or so and she still doesn't get it. My dad on the other hand let's me and my sister's have our own way of worshipping and does not care whether we go to church or not. What more can I do. I sent a long email explaining my beliefs a long time ago and stated in person my feelings and she still persists. Don't get me wrong she accepts my sexuality and stuff but she is still a very devout catholic sometimes so much it drive me nuts.
Was she pushing church before you moved home? It could just be that she worries about whether you have a support group around you, and thinks that church could help with that. If that's the case, maybe letting her know that you do have people, and that you're keeping your mind occupied will help. If simply saying that you would prefer not to go isn't working, being able to argue the Protestant case against the need for a church might help and show that it's a considered opinion. But it's up to you to say whether that would actually help, or just upset her. Is anyone else in your family a non-Catholic? Do you know if in general she thinks non-Catholics are proper Christians, able to be redeemed in the same way? Sorry, I'm genuinely not stalking you around this forum, but threads about religion will kind of act as bait to me, even if this isn't actually a debate kind of thread.
When i lived with them and in the same town as them she always pushed church on me. She persistently believes you need church to build a relationship with God. I think she also has the belief that you might go to hell if you don't attend a church. I think that is the root of the problem. I even sent her a long email and explained my view before and it didn't seem to work. There are several people in my family who are non-catholic and she does not judge them or anything. She just accepts it. i appreciate your thoughts and in no way do I think your stalking me. Maybe I need to personally make it more clear to her that I don't believe in organized religion and that you need a church to build a relationship with christ.
How old are you? if youre 16 (maybe 15), then you dont HAVE to go to church when your mother wants you to. its entirely your choice. now, if youre legally an adult, then you definately do not at all have to go. if she tries to force you to go, just say "mom, im an adult. i respect your beliefs in going to church, so respect my belief in not going to church." if she still doesnt get it... then who cares? is she gonna drag you by the ankles? i doubt it. i wish you the best of luck <3
I am 24 years old. Yeah exactly but it is just annoying of her to keep persisting I come to church. Just shut up about it already. Get the point.
You are an adult. You don;t have to do anything you don't want to do. Hang out with your dad instead.
I understand It can just be as easy to ignore my mother since I am adult. But the thing is how do I explain this not just some kind of rebellion against church this is a strict opinion of mine that I don't believe in organized religion and she needs to understand that. t is like not going to church is almost as worst as being a atheist to her.
Oh well. Hopefully she'll get the point eventually. She has not bothered me about to church in about 24 hours so that's progress! lol
I always like the saying 'Standing in a church doesn't make you a Christian/Catholic any more than standing in a garage makes you a car'. I know that God doesn't exist solely within the walls of a church......churches adn religion were created by man, not by God. Religion may provide circumstances and locations where communication and living a God-fearing life are easier to live but they are by no means the ONLY way to have a relationship with God. I was raised in a religion too and yet i have not been to church for 17 years and since coming out of the closet a few years back, I feel more at peace with God and feel more comfortable with my feelings of Him than I ever did when I went to church....I hope your mum starts to acceopt things the way they are for you and that she comes to realise that you dont have to stand in a church in order to love God or to be a believer...I beleive in God, not in bricks and mortar Good luck
Thanks. Same here. I felt closer to God when I left the church and began to build a more personal relationship with him. I consider myself a born again christian and of course my mom wouldn't even understand that concept. I know many good people attend church and think for themselves but I know many who go to church and don't think for themselves and that is why I keep my distance. Too many people quote their ministers and get their logic solely from their priests or ministers and don't do the research their selves and that really turns me off from church. Despite many instances where I explained my newfound faith in Christ and she still has not got the picture I hope she gets the point eventually. I made a vow towards god I would lead by my own personal religious doctrine and not align myself with any church and think for myself.
There's a good chance you both see "going to church" in different ways. It might be worth a try to have a conversation with your mom to try and understand what it is about going to church that makes it important for her - maybe it's as simple as she wants you to have emotional/spiritual support in the only way she knows works for her, or she thinks she is seen as a "bad mom" in her community because her kids don't go to church, or her most intense memory of her "family moments" growing up is attending church with her parents and she wishes she shared that bonding ritual with you, or a million other reasons. Maybe she just won't have an explanation either, and "it's just a thing all good people do"? But what I'm getting at is once you get a better understanding of the "whys" you may be able to find common ground and some sort of healthy compromise on both parts. And at least you have tried and can agree to disagree if it comes to that.
My mom grew up attending church and is very active in attending church. My dad didn't really attend as a kid and because of that is more laid back about church attendance even though he does attend every Sunday now. I think it is hard for her to understand it from my perspective. Those are questions to be asked and maybe Ill try that.You grow up and are raised a certain way you sometimes only see one way of doing things and think that is the way it should be. I am not willing to compromise on anything though. You never compromise on your principles and this is a serious principle for me. I developed these principles and along with my deceased boyfriend took a vow before God that we would worship him in our own personal all way. I think what will work is the next time my mom brings up going to to church I'll kindly explain my position. Sometimes that is what it takes a personal in person explanation and everything gets cleared up.
