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Any advice?....abuse

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by finboy, Mar 22, 2015.

  1. finboy

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    So first of all I'm Finnish so I don't speak english that great... sry for that!

    Anyway.. I have been in a relationship with this guy for 3 years already. I'm 21 and he is 29.. I know there's a "big" age difference.
    The thing is that he as gotten really jealous lately. I can't text any friends or look for something on the computer without him asking "who are you talking to?" "are you talking with someone?" "can I see?" .
    Reason why I'm asking for advice here is because he knows my password to my phone, computer, fb, emails and any other social media I have. I can't talk to my friends about my problems without him seeing everything and getting pissed off. I'm not cheating or anything like that! Feels like I'm trapped and can't breath..
    Few months ago I actually changed my phone password and didn't allow him using it. I said I need some privacy and that its good for the relationship. If he wants to know something, he can ask.. Well that didn't go so good.. We fought about it for at least 2 weeks every.single.day.. And finally one day he demanded that I give him the phone again... I denied it and he grabbed my arm... hard. I told him to let me go and he was hurting me. Next thing he tried to take the phone from me. I managed to get off from his grip but then he hit me really hard in the face.. he have never ever done something like that..
    I just stood there in silence and asked after a while; "what the hell is wrong with you?" He didn't answer me and left the room.
    It didn't take long before he attacked again. We were fighting again about privacy when he took a grip around my throat and started to choke me. He didn't let go when I asked him to stop.. when he finally let go I fell down.. my legs didn't carry me. I had bruise marks around my throat for many days :frowning2:
    I really need some advice now.. I'm scared and I don't know what to do! He have said many times if I leave him, I'm dead.. I didn't take it seriously but I'm getting more scared now :/ If I leave him I know he will freak out.. :frowning2: I don't have any parents to turn to (both dead) and only family I have left is grandma... and I won't tell her this kind of things.. I don't want her to worry...
    Sry for the long post... I know its messy... not easy to tell these kind of things
    // Finboy
     
  2. Michael

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    Please... Go to the police. Take your id and papers and go right now.

    You are not safe there, and he could actually kill you.
    Do not think twice about this : Act.
    Just go now.
     
  3. Chiroptera

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    I agree with Michael. Go to a safe place, and talk to the police.

    Don't let the abuse continue, do not let him threat you. Please, leave this guy and talk to the police. This is serious.
     
  4. EDMJunkie

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    This is a controlling, abusive monster that deserves to be punished for their deplorable actions. They need to be arrested and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. I agree with the others. Leave as soon as you can and report this piece of trash.

    Pysy turvallinen , ja pitää meidät ajan tasalla .
     
  5. finboy

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    Im okay! :slight_smile:
    I did it. It wasn't easy and he didn't take it well. But all that matters now that I'm okay and its over :slight_smile: I want to thank you all who supported me! :slight_smile: THANK YOU! =) // finboy
     
  6. penta

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    Did you also went to the police?
    Because if he did this to you the odds are pretty big he'll do it to the next boyfriend too..
     
  7. headie2infinity

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    I agree with penta, this really needs to be reported because he could do this to another person.

    I am glad you got out, no one is ever allowed to do that to another person. EVER. You deserve so much more than that.
     
  8. finboy

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    I did :slight_smile: I felt so ashamed to tell them something like this but they we're really kind and understanding :slight_smile: