I know this question probably gets asked a lot. But, I've been reading through some of the post and I just can't seem to find the right answer that applies to my situation so I decided to ask. I've been dating this boy, who I will refer to as Derrek, for 6 months now. Derrek is much older than me, but not in a pedophile kind of way. He has just already graduated high school. But, he is not only older in age he also has a lot more experience than me, sex being one of those experience. He has had sex with a numerous amount of boys. Once when we were sharing sexual experience, which I had none to share except the time my ex crush patted me on the back, I asked him how many times he has had sex. He had to think about it for a really long time and then finally said the question would be easier to answer if I asked him how many people because how many times is too big of a number to think of So I was like "Ok, So how many." Then he was like "Actually that one is hard too, I don't know. A lot." I got really upset about this and we fought a lot about it and he made me feel really bad because "the past doesn't define him." So I learned to accept that my boyfriend use to be a man-whore and loved him anyway. Recently, he's been really pushing me to have sex with him. Don't get me wrong, I really want to have the magic intimacy of having sex with him but I am so fucking scared. I am so incredibly self conscious about my body. Like he tells me that he loves it and stuff but if we ever do it, it'll be under the blankets with the lights out. No exceptions. So now that you understand my situation here are my questions: How bad does it hurt to bottom? I know lube is suppose to help but I can't even get enough nerve to but a finger up there. Will it smell? like shit Will when he pulls out will shit come out too? I know to take a dump well before we have sex, but what if it decided to do it unexpectedly. I think sex is super meaningful and I believe in true love. I also believe he is the guy for me. But i feel like it is less special that he has already had sex with some man people, and that'll I'll just be another number of a person he can't remember he had sex with. I am scared that I won't be good or moan enough. Or that it'll hurt too bad and I'll cry... Any advise or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I am very thankful for anyone who read all of this shit and nicely commented. Also, feel free to let me Pm you and rant about my problems
Ok so your bf had a lot of sex, so what? If he's healthy and uses common sense and knows what he's doing and knows that your needs have to be met too, that's great. If he is a good boyfriend then that will be an advantage for you because he will have a pretty good shot of making you feel comfortable and feeling good throughout the whole thing. First I'd ask him about being tested to make sure there's nothing there, if he says "don't you trust me" tell him yes but you want to be sure, if he doesn't want to get tested that's a gigantic flaming red flag and you don't have sex with him what so ever. First, don't get nervous, nervous means tight and tight means ouch. lots of lube, tons, let him or yourself put 1, then 2, then maybe 3 fingers up there to prep you. if you're concerned about stuff coming out, take a dump before, shower, use soap and clean yourself well down there. You should be fine after that. If there is stuff, well, shit happens. He knows where he's sticking it, he should not be surprised if something comes out. also when he's in you your going to feel like you need to dump, that's normal, if you did your little bathroom routine beforehand, it may even help to "poop" since you won't be constricting your butt you'll be opening it and loosening because your trying to push something out (obviously don't fake shit so hard you either push him out or actually shit, again common sense) it may smell, it may not smell, it'll probably smell and feel like whatever the lube smells and feels like. also, it a good idea to have him insert his dick so that there's no accidentally spearing you with it if someone loses their footing because that will hurt. Also, take your time! This isn't a race, I'd recommend taking him all the way in before he takes you to pound town so your butt has accommodated his full member. Also if he does something you absolutely love, tell him to keep doing it, same goes for you, make sure he's getting off as much as you are. I think I got the basics, you message on the wall if you need something though no promises on a timely response. good luck, from an ex man whore
