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How to tell a FWB I'm into somebody else.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by AAASAS, Mar 26, 2015.

  1. AAASAS

    Full Member

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    The title tells it all. I've been seeing a guy for about a month, I really liked him but he is super busy with work and can't hang out as often, his Dad also is a homophobe so I'm not really able to hang out at his place. He told me before we hooked up that he couldn't do a proper relationship.

    I spilled my heart out to him about a week ago saying I really liked him and asking if there was any chance to go deeper than just basically fuck buddies, he said that he couldn't cause of work...etc, but he still is really into me.

    He lives in the next town over.

    Anyway I've been out with this other guy; he knows I went on a dates with him, and I'm really falling for him, he's really into me too. He's from Mobile, Alabama(moved up here to be with his old boyfriend who cheated on him), and has a visa for another two years; so long term is pretty probable. He's also 30 and I'm about to turn 25 so there is a bit of an age difference but not that large.

    Only thing is I feel guilty going out with this guy while I have my FWB on the side, and I sorta wanna end it with this guy, but I honestly don't know how to go about it. I know it's his own fault for not wanting a relationship but I still feel really bad cause he does actually really like me.

    I honestly don't know what to do cause one guy is Canadian and will eventually be able to have a full time relatioship, and the other guy is planning on moving back to the U.S, but I honestly like the American way more, I just feel it'd be a waste to put effort into him if he just ends up moving back to Alabama. We're both country hicks so we get along, and my FWB is a country hick too so I really get along with him too. I just don't know how to end it, and really don't know if it's a good idea, what would other people do?
     
  2. sweetfemme90

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    I see the problem- you are having to choose between a temporarily available guy versus a FWB with potential long-term outcome.

    In all honesty I would change the FWB status with the other dude to just friends for now. You want a relationship but he cannot offer that to you right now. Who knows though? Maybe in the future he can...you know like waaaay down the road. The American guy if he likes you as much as you like him sounds great. He is available and interested in you. He can give you the relationship you want that the FWB cannot offer at this time because of other life commitments. That's okay! This is all okay.
     
  3. tulipinacup

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    I agree, I think remaining in contact with the FWB seems nice and I do think he'll be up for it seeing as which you guys aren't really in a serious relationship. You don't have to end up but you also have to point out that the farthest thing that you guys will be doing now is friendship.