So the other day I finally got the balls to talk to my crush, and when we did talk he seemed very receptive and, frankly, very gay and into me. So naturally I was like sweet, let's get the ball rolling. That was a few days ago. Just today, though, I saw him in the hall and he wasn't looking in my direction at first until I looked at him long enough so that he made eye contact with me and then I said hi and he gestured a hi back with his hand (he had his usual headphones on...damnit those things make it so hard to talk to him). Just for the record, I have every intention of striking up another conversation with him at some point and trying to see if we could get coffee together, but I'm a little perplexed by his behavior. Then again, if he were straight and just saw me as a new pal, then why wouldn't he just give a normal hello when we passed each other? I've watched youtube vids about going after your crush but they're mostly from a straight perspective. How does it work with gay guys? Is one supposed to pursue and the other receive? How do you know when to give up on a crush, or even if he's gay at all??? Any advice would be much appreciated! ---------- Post added 10th Apr 2015 at 01:33 PM ---------- I suppose I should add that in my department at my university I have a reputation for being straight as I just got out of a relationship with a girl (and I believe he may have seen me walking around with her before too). Could that have something to do with it?
Keep in mind that I haven't been successful in the past with either girls or guys, but here's what I recommend. Just keep talking to him and trying to find something in common. Finding that particular thing you are both into can lead to meetings outside of university. In the past, I have been too pushy, and ask people out too soon. Don't do the same thing. Start it as a friendship, and then mature it into something romantic. Also, never assume. There might be something behind why he was non-receptive. Maybe he was having a bad day. Also, how do you know he's gay or into you?
Yes, it is possible he thinks you're just another friendly straight guy, but I also think starting a friendship is a simple way of getting to know him better since you don't know his sexuality. Try to get him to talk with you regularly (if he wants to talk, he'll take off the headphones).
Thanks, I suppose the best thing really is to just keep talking to him, but it's hard when we don't have any classes together. The truth is I don't know if he's gay or into me, but I caught him looking at me before and when I finally got up the courage to talk to him he seemed nervous and excited about talking to me. I guess I shouldn't assume anything, though. I like the idea of being patient and trying to get to know him bit by bit, but it's hard to be patient when you really just want to know whether it's worth pursuing or not. Thanks again for your replies.
